


Done For You

by HaruSpring88, paigeypoo



Category: Black Veil Brides, Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Angst, Eventual Smut, Feelings, M/M, explicit for later chapters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-30
Updated: 2015-02-19
Packaged: 2018-02-27 14:58:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 31,794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2697170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HaruSpring88/pseuds/HaruSpring88, https://archiveofourown.org/users/paigeypoo/pseuds/paigeypoo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Both of them are waging an internal war with their own emotions. Neither of them expected to run face first into a stranger at a local coffee shop in London.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. We All Fall Down

**Author's Note:**

> This idea came to us both one night while we were sharing stories and youtube videos about Sherlock (Benedict Cumberbatch) and Black Veil Brides. We started looking at pictures of these two, putting them side by side and fell just a little bit in love with the idea of the two of them together, seeing as they are both gorgeous. Thus, an idea was born and here are the results. It is a work in progress and we hope you enjoy reading it as much as we enjoy writing it!

_Andy_

I don’t know what I was thinking; Ashley has always been such a womanizer. I should have known there was no chance he was gay. Now, I have another seven months on tour where I can’t get away from him.

I adjusted my sunglasses. At least in London, I can walk around without the groupies getting too crazy. I don’t think I could handle that… not today. I found a nearby bench and sat down. As much as I was dreading tonight’s show because I had to see his face, I was just as excited. I knew that performing would take all my pain away, even if it was just for an hour.

I pulled out my phone as I felt a vibration. It was CC posting about how he was stoked to play tonight. We had a great line up planned, starting with “Heart of Fire.” The crowd was sure to be fantastic; people were already lined up outside last night. I posted a tweet: “I believe that we all fall down sometimes,” and sometimes we don’t get back up… that’s okay. Lyrics from “Lost it All.” It’s still one of my favorite songs we’ve done as a band. I kind of hoped Ashley would see it. I also hoped he didn’t. I didn’t feel like answering questions. This was truly my moment of falling down. I guess that song is about me now.

I really had no idea what to do. I had always believed I was straight. I was with Juliet for five years before I realized I had an attraction to the band’s bassist, Ashley Purdy. I ended things with Juliet, after I explained to her how I was feeling. We are still on good terms and she even wished me luck with Ashley. I should have just stopped there and left it at my daydreams.

I leaned my head back and recalled last night: “Ash, can I talk to you for a minute?” “Sure Andy. What’s up?” I remember looking into those chocolate brown eyes. His breath smelled of Whiskey, his only clothing a bandana and pair of torn up shorts. He truly was the outlaw. I pulled myself from my stare and looked to the floor. “Ashley, I’m gay.” It took a moment before he spoke. “So, that’s why you ended things with Juliet.” I nodded. “It’s alright man. To each his own. We still love you all the same. The fans will too. Nothing to worry over.” “That’s not all, Ash.” “What’s wrong?” “I… I love someone.” I glanced from the floor to his face out of the corner of my eye. I didn’t want him to notice. He truly was beautiful. “That’s great Andy, go for it!” He seemed so excited for me. He obviously had no idea what I was about to say. “I’m pretty sure he’d never go for a guy like me.” I chuckled nervously. “Can’t hurt to find out.” He shrugged. I looked up anxiously. “Ash… it’s you.” His eyes went cold for a moment. “I see.” He was quiet. “Andy, you know I love you. We’ve been in this band together for five years. I’m just not into guys, man. I’ll always love you like a brother and I’ll always be there for you.” I should have known. He put his hand on my shoulder. “Look Andy.” I looked up at him. “There’s a guy out there for you. It’s not me. And trust me; you can do way better than me.” He smiled and stood up. “Just take your time Andy.” He walked off leaving me to sit in my bunk. I laid back. I should’ve known.

I turned to go back to the hotel. If I wasn’t back in time for makeup and meet and greet, the guys would surely kill me, so would my fans. I smiled. If there was anyone I could count on in this world. It’s the band’s army. They’re some cool mother fuckers.

I saw a café down the way. A cappuccino didn’t sound too bad right now. It might give me the kick I need to smile for the fans. As I was walking in the door I got a text from Jake telling me to hurry up because make-up was starting. I ordered a vanilla cappuccino and bolted out the door. I immediately felt stupid because I ran straight into someone.

I'm so sorry. I wasn’t paying attention.” His voice was like liquid velvet.

He wasn’t quite as tall as me, but he was a handsome man, mid-thirties probably, strong features and dark curly hair. He was well dressed and he looked like he was seriously contemplating something. I realized I needed to respond. “It’s fine. I wasn’t paying attention. I shouldn’t have been running.” I nodded and took off out the door. I didn’t want the band to kill me for being so late.


	2. Where Do I Go From Here

_Sherlock_

"The signs are all there, even you lot can't miss them!" I know I'm yelling, but I am really not in the mood for Lestrade and his team of simpletons today. John would tell me off for yelling at Lestrade, he would tell me to listen, but John isn't here. No, John is living in domestic bliss with his new wife Mary and here I am stuck dealing with this frighteningly dull case.

I can't help but wonder what this case would have been like if John was with me, he always did seem to add an element of interest to even the most boring of cases. But, John isn't really in the picture anymore and I am now finding myself in an incredibly ill-timed bout of what ordinary people would certainly call an emotional crisis.

I should have never let myself feel, love is a chemical defect found on the losing side. My feelings for John only came to fruition when I returned to London after being "dead" for two years, and it was too late, he was already engaged to Mary. I lost him and it seems I'm still losing, if Lestrade's endless babble is anything to go on.

I hang up on him before he can bore me any further with his carryings on. He can figure this one out for himself because right now all I want to do is drown my utter distaste for this entire situation in a large cup of coffee.

I'm rounding the corner that leads into the coffee shop and I feel my phone vibrate. If this is Lestrade again I swear to all that is holy I'm going to off him. I unlock my phone and glance at the text, it's from John. I am just about to read it when I run face first into someone.

"I'm so sorry, I wasn't paying attention" I absent-mindedly say before sticking my phone in my pocket. "It’s fine. I wasn’t paying attention. I shouldn’t have been running". His voice is deep and powerful. The instant effect it has on me in almost embarrassing and I feel my cheeks heat at the direction of my thoughts.

I look up and his eyes catch my attention first, they are a gorgeous shade of blue. He is a few inches taller than I am, in his early twenties, and his prominent features are enhanced by flawless skin and dark hair. He is dressed like a rocker, all dark clothes and tattoos. I am inexplicably drawn to him, and I immediately try to deduce him, that is until he takes off again.

I watch him dash down the street. He's in a rock band, that was a deduction even the simplest of brains couldn't miss. He is young, but he is already very accomplished. Today is just not his day, he's dealing with an array of emotions upon discovering that his love interest did not return his affections. I can relate to this man already.

It takes me longer than it should to realize I'm still standing idle on the sidewalk in front of the coffee shop. I know that I should go in, get my coffee, and continue on with the day as I had originally planned it, but I just can't get this guy out of my head and before I realize exactly what I'm doing, I find myself walking in the direction that he ran.

He is obviously a rock star and he's running late, judging my his hasty retreat from the coffee shop, that must mean he has a show he is playing tonight. I do a quick search through my mind palace, I know I read something about a concert this morning….AH HA! Black Veil Brides, they are playing a concert here in London tonight, he must be a member of the band.

I continue down the street, my new destination just a few blocks away, and I can't stop thinking about him. I want to know him, talk to him, both which are absolutely foreign to me. I am not one to get too close to people, it's bad in my line of work, and it's terribly distracting. I can't afford another distraction, I can't handle another John Watson, and I definitely can't just drop everything to go to a random rock concert.

"One please, front row, make it happen". I know the man selling tickets, he owes me a favor, I saved his life last year. He hands me my ticket, front row just as I requested, and I walk to the entrance of the building. Apparently I can drop everything to go to a random rock concert, but only if it involves a gorgeous rocker I accidentally ran into, quite literally, going into a coffee shop.


	3. Unbroken

_Andy_

"Damn man, where were you?” Jinxx asked as the make-up artist worked on his eyes.

“I went for a walk to clear my head on the way back I grabbed a cappuccino. I just didn’t move fast enough coming back.” 

“Well you made it, that’s what matters.” CC laughed. I set my drink on the counter and sat in the make-up chair. I was usually the first person to do this. I would go start on sound check while everyone else finished up, looks like it was backwards today.

“Where’s Jake and Ash?” I was getting a black line painted across my nose.

"Started on sound check. We just figured we’d make sure you got here on time.” CC was putting his fingerless gloves on. 

They headed to sound check while I sat patiently. Doing make-up never takes as long now as it did back in the beginning when we did the full body war paint. We got sick a lot of those nights because it kept us from sweating. It was a combination of that and growing up that we sort of phased it out over time. Though, a lot of our fans still show up to shows with it. It always makes me happy to see them expressing themselves, no matter what media it is.

“Okay, Mr. Biersack. You’re finished.” She closed up her supply box and left me to get dressed. 

I had so much shit I could perform in it was insane. I decided on my batman cut out tshirt, black skinnies, and boots. The only time I didn’t perform in some sort of combat boots was during Warped Tour a few years back. It was so hot that the soles of my boots would melt. I had to wear Vans and Converse. I still don’t know how Ash managed to perform in his cowboy boots without a problem. The guys a fashioneesta so who knows. I smiled. Ash was such a character. As quick as the smile was there, it faded; I realized I shouldn’t think about Ash like that. He’d never be mine.

Iput on my monster sweat bands and clip bracelets; I grabbed my random batman necklace and threw it on. I loved batman. It always made things a little bit better. I did one last check before heading out to finish sound check. 

On the stage my eyes were immediately drawn to Ashley, with his long hair and Mistfits shirt. Of course he was in his signature boots. I was greeted by the stage manager.

“You managed to make it right now time Andy.” 

“I’d never be anything else.” I laughed. “I don’t spend hours in the mirror like these divas, I gestured to my bandmates.” Our stage manager laughed.

Sound check went successfully, with no problems. They generally did. It was during the actual show where things tended to go wrong: mics cut out, amps wouldn’t work, one time we lost power to the entire venue. We always come back from mishaps like that. If anything were to go wrong tonight, I prayed it wasn’t a mic cutting out because that would mean singing straight into the mic on Ashley’s face. I’d do it for the fans, but it wouldn’t be a comfortable situation. 

I loved our meet and greets. Our fans were always so excited. I wished we get more one on one time with them, as we’ve lost a lot of the time as the band has grown, but we can either reach out to more, or get closer to more. I wanted the chance to inspire the world. I wanted to inspire them. I’m always told I save them, but I’m nobody’s hero. I’m just a guy who loves to sing. And I love for my fans to sing with me. 

Our meet and greets were always full of so many diverse people. Just like our concerts. The ages ranged between six and sixty, all different band t-shirts and colors. Male and female, though I’d say the ratio of female to male was highly skewed. All of them different people with different stories just like each member of the band. All of them felt like outcasts and that’s why they were here… to have a good time. 

We signed countless band merchandise and took photos. One fan was nice enough to bring us candy. If there’s one thing other than boos we wouldn’t say no to, it was candy. CC nearly attacked me when the young girl handed it to me. Never mind, he had his own. Ashley thanked her by signing her boobs. I turned away and stood up, happy that she was the last person left. It was show time. 

We walked out to our fans chanting: “Black Veil Brides” over and over. It was a tradition now, they believed we’d be out sooner. We followed the schedule, but it was sure as hell rewarding to listen to. The chanting stopped as we all stormed on stage and started off the show with “Heart of Fire.” I scanned the crowd as I always did, surprised to see that guy I ran into at the café. He did not look like the types that usually attended our shows. Diversity. 

We continued next with Coffin, Fallen Angels, and Knives and Pens, a classic from our Debut album that was close to home for me, the band, and all the fans in the audience. The band always worked the stage when we performed, but I was trying really hard to avoid getting too close to Ashley. I’m not sure if anyone noticed, but it was still hard to be around him. 

I almost stopped in my tracks when I remembered that our next song in the set was “Lost it All.” Jinxx was out on stage playing “Overture” on the violin.

I had a minute and twenty seconds to compose myself to sing that song. The one song that would bring on the pain from knowing Ashley would never care for me… and we had to include it in tonight’ set. Dammit. We walk back to the front of the stage and begin. I wave my arm back and forth to get the fans to join in. And begin. 

“I ruled the world… with these hands I shook the heavens to the ground.” I looked through the crowd again to the café guy in the front row. His eyes were really focused on me…. Or my singing, I couldn’t quite pinpoint what it is he was concentrating on. It was borderline creepy, yet interesting.

“I laid the gods… to rest.” I managed to stay mostly composed for the majority of the song until the end… 

“I believe that we all fall down sometimes.” I almost broke down, but I remembered that we’d walk off stage after this and have the encore. That was always the best part for me. High energy songs would bring my mood back up. Sure enough it did. I wouldn’t break completely. Not yet.

We finished off with a cover of Billy Idol’s Rebel Yell and our award winning song In the End. We went forward and bowed and threw some props and equipment to the audience. I gave one last smile to the audience. I realized that the mysteriously well-dressed man was gone. As I headed back to change and wash the make-up off, I wondered where he’d seemingly vanished to.

 


	4. Who Will Save Me Now

_Sherlock_

I hate crowds, they are little more than large gatherings of the simple minded and more often than not they make for far too much stupid in one room. But, there is something about this crowd of people. They are…..intriguing.

"Great seats right?" I hear someone say and I'm surprised to see a young woman smiling up at me.

Intriguing indeed, this lot of people, no one ever initiates conversation with me. I have been told I'm a bit….unapproachable. Well, that is my term for it, others tend to be a little less kind in their descriptions of me.

"Quite" I smile back at her, remembering what John used to tell me about smiles. 'It humanizes you, Sherlock, people need to know your human'. I can hear his voice in my head as if he is standing right next to me and I remember the text from earlier.

I pull out my phone and see the text is still there, unread. I open it and begin to read, I will never understand why John feels he has to write an award winning novel when he sends a text, it's so tedious. 'Sherlock, it's been a little over a week since I've heard from you. I need to know that you are okay, that you haven't gotten yourself kidnapped, injured, or God forbid killed. My deductions skills may not be on par with yours but it doesn't take Sherlock Holmes to see that something is bothering you. Please, call me, or at the very least send me a text. I worry about you. John x'.

I can feel tears coming unbid to my eyes and I silently curse myself for opening the text. I know I can't be mad at John, he is being a friend, like he always has been. It's not John's fault that I allowed myself to feel, he doesn't know and I will not tell him.

"Have you been to a Black Veil Brides concert before?" I realize the young lady next to me is talking to me again.

"No, how about yourself?" I have been told it's polite to answer and ask a similar question, in social situations such as these. It's tedious, I can easily deduce her answer. She could have deduced mine as well if she had half a mind to try. People would be surprised what they could discover if only they would just think and observe.

"Yes, this is my third concert. You will love it" Well, that is a mighty ambitious statement on her part, she clearly doesn't have the ability to deduce that information about me, though it wouldn't be hard to so.

"Judging by my willingness to be here and my obvious interest in my overall surroundings, I would say you are quite correct in your assumption. This is your third time seeing this particular group, like you said, but you left out the four other times you listened to them from outside a sold out venue because you were unable to get tickets. You are a long time fan, you have two….no three…..posters of the band hanging in your bedroom. You know the lyrics to every song, they have brought you through tough times. You feel you owe your very existence to this group of gentlemen, they have saved your life, in a manner of speaking, many times".

The deduction is flying out of my mouth before I can stop it, and I brace myself for the inevitable anger it will cause. People don't usually appreciate my deductions, though I will never understand why, it's not my fault they are so utterly transparent!

"Wow, that's cool! How did you do that?" I am taken aback when she is not only not angry, but giddy (really?) over my deduction. She doesn't call me a freak or a psychopath, and neither do the others around me who heard it. They all smile and ask me how I did it. These people, they are accepting, an intriguing group indeed. Suddenly, the lights go down.

"Black Veil Brides. Black Veil Brides. Black Veil Brides" I hear the crowd begin to chant and I put the phone I'm still holding in my pocket. I'm not going to reply to that text, I have nothing to say. I'm not okay. I've lost already and I'm continuing to lose and I just can't deal with this right now. I'm not quite sure what is compelling me, but I find myself chanting along with the rest of the crowd.

The band storms energetically onto the stage and begins to play. There he is, the gorgeous rocker from the coffee shop, singing with an amazing energy. If I thought he had an incredible voice when he spoke, it was nothing compared to when he sang. I look up at him and I think he looks at me, if only for a split second, but I can't be sure.

I allow myself to sway in time to the music as each song is played and I get lost in the sound. I do not allow my mind to shut off completely, that would make me far too vulnerable, but I would be lying if I said I wasn't enjoying this. I didn't have to hide here, not with these people, I could be myself. I think of John, what would he think of this? Would he like it? I can almost imagine him grinning at me as he observed my own reaction to this situation. He would say something like 'Sherlock Holmes, you are actually enjoying this!' and I would laugh and tell him he had a never ending grasp of the obvious.

The tempo slows and I hear a piano begin to play a soft, almost sad tune. He, the gorgeous rocker, begins to sing, his voice deep and full of a passion that can only come from someone who is singing something that means a great deal to them.I stand and listen as the song picks up and I feel those unbidden tears prick at my eyes again.

"Then I lost it all. Dead and broken. My backs against the wall. Cut me open. I'm just trying to breath, just trying to figure it out. Because I built these walls to watch them crumbling down. I said, 'Then I lost it all'. Who can save me now?" I take in his words and they cut through me like a knife, because they say everything that I can't. They illustrate my fear when I jumped from the roof of Saint Bart's. They communicate my two year struggle, the years that I was "dead", as I made my way across the globe, taking down the largest criminal web there has ever been to save my friends. They tell the story of my captivity in Serbia and my journey home. They say exactly what I felt when I saw John with Mary, every defense, every wall I'd ever built to protect myself from these emotions crumbling pathetically at my feet. The only thought that brought me through all the pain, the struggle, the beatings, completely out of reach. My sole hope for my return, lost.

"I believe that we all fall down sometimes" One of those tears slips down my cheek. I am momentarily disgusted with this vulgar display of weakness when I look up at the gorgeous rocker pouring his soul into this beautiful song and realize I'm not the only one struggling here tonight.

I feel my phone vibrate and I step out for a moment to answer the call. Of course, it's Lestrade with another boring case. I hang up on him again, because he's nothing short of exasperating, and hurry back into the venue.

I make it back inside in time to see the band retreat backstage, the concert has come to an end. I walk out of the concert hall, memories long passed swimming through my head. I wonder idly if I will ever see the gorgeous rocker again.I replay that beautiful song over in my mind as I make my way out of the building.

"Who can save me now?" I sing softly to myself. I walk around back, deciding that taking the alleyway home would be the quickest route by foot, I don't feel like hailing a cab, I need the fresh air. I round the corner and stop, there he is. He is standing at the entrance to the alleyway, back against the concrete wall, staring up at the night sky.


	5. Youth and Whiskey

_Andy_

I headed out to the alley behind the venue. I could get some more peace and quiet from the band and smoke some much needed cigarettes.

I leaned against the wall and put a foot up, lighting the first of many ‘cancer sticks’ I was likely to go through tonight. The sky looked rather beautiful. For being in the middle of London, the stars were so easy to see, and the moon was full. This would be nice if someone like Ash was here. I frowned. I bet he’s going out to get drunk.

I heard someone clear their throat. I turned to see where it came from. It was the mystery man. “Small world.” I might as well acknowledge him. He didn’t look like a groupie, but who knows.

“Indeed it is.” He really looked like he was concentrating hard on something. It looks like he needs to relax as much as I do. I offered him an obligatory “you seem tense want a smoke” cigarette. He hesitated, but took one from the box and lit it quickly before tossing me my lighter back.

“What brings you to the dark and mysterious alley way?” I light up a second.

“This is the fastest route to my home.” Makes sense. This is really awkward. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do right now.

“Umm… sorry again about this afternoon. I was running late. I bolted out the door without paying attention.” 

“Not a problem, Mr. Biersack.” Wait. How did he know my name, I thought dumbly? He was at my concert just now. Obviously, he’d know my name, or at least figure it out.

“Call me Andy. No one, even my crew who works for me calls me Mr. Biersack. It makes me feel old.” I took a long drag off my cigarette. I stared at him a moment. Why was he wearing a suit? “Normally, my fans give me their names too.” I chuckled.I probably sounded like an ass, but frankly, I wasn’t in the greatest of moods. 

“Sherlock Holmes.” He reached out to shake my hand. I did the same with my Marlboro free hand.

“That’s almost as interesting as my bass player’s name.” I laughed. The back door near us opened. It was Ashley and CC. Ash had a bottle of Jack Daniels in his hand.

“ANNNNDDDDYYYY!” CC was already beginning to get drunk. “Andy, you wanna head down to the bars and party with us. Two days off dude!” Ashley took a big drink of his whiskey. I gave him a look that was a cross between anger, pain, and love. I’m not sure which. I’d go if I thought he’d not sex up a girl right in front of me. I don’t think I can handle any more of that. Ashley’s life was full of sex, women, and whiskey. 

“Not tonight guys.” I finished my second cigarette. “I need a break.” They shrugged their shoulders and the door shut loudly behind them. Time for my third cigarette. I don’t think I’ll live past forty anyways. Might as well enjoy what years I have left. Sherlock was looking at me intently, as if I was supposed to finish something.

“What’s your bass player’s name?” “Oh.” I remember now. “Ashley Purdy. His middle name is Abrocket. I’m not even sure how anyone would think to name a guy that.” I laughed awkwardly. “Actually, he was the guy with the Jack Daniels just a second ago.”

“I see.” Not only was Sherlock mysterious, but he seemed quiet as well, but I was probably rubbing him the wrong way. I’m just so lost in my own thoughts tonight. He probably thinks I’m a complete tool. Everyone on the planet who’s seen me in an interview knows that’s not the case at all. His phone went off. He simply looked at the screen angrily and shoved it back in his pocket. Seems he has problems too.

I just realized that this man knew my name, but not Ashley’s or CC’s. He also doesn’t seem like a groupie, but he was in the front row. Why? I slid down the wall to sit on the ground. Fourth cigarette trailing my lips as I started to chew on my lip ring.

“Which song did you like the most?” I decided to ask. I suck ass at starting conversations apparently. 

“They were all rather enjoyable. Lost it All was my favorite.” He seemed a bit reluctant to tell me.

“That’s always been a favorite of mine.” I took another long drag and blew the smoke from my nose. I stood up again. “Do you mind walking with me? I’m almost out of cigarettes and it seems like neither of us have much going on.”

“Of course.”


	6. Tea and Conversation

_Sherlock_

I'm not sure what I was expecting when I realized that we had run into each other yet again, but I can say for absolute certain that taking a walk with Andy wasn't it, not that I'm complaining.

For the first few minutes we walk side by side in silence, he has a lot on his mind and he's having trouble shutting it off, even for a moment. Unrequited love, that's what it is, that's what is at the root of the problem.

He is in love with someone….a man….and he doesn't return his affections. It's someone that he is close to, he has to spend a lot of time around them, someone in the band then. It doesn't take me long to deduce that it's the man with the funny name….Ashley I believe it was. I could tell by the way his face changed when he looked at him. Dilated pupils, stiffer posture, averted gaze, and I can venture to guess an increased heart rate.

He is in love with another member of the band and he is currently having quite the emotional crisis over it, not the mention the fact that he just recently came out as gay.

Under normal circumstances, I would be smug about this deduction, because under normal circumstances it would be a pretty good one. As it stands, this deduction wasn't made because I can read him quicker and more efficiently than some, it was made because I recognize the situation when I see it. I know what it's like, what he's going through. I can recognize it in him because I know it in myself.

"Your music, it's impressive" I decide to break the silence.

"Thanks…." He starts and stops, he wants to say something else but he doesn't. I know that he as questions, particularly questions about me.

"You've got questions" I decide to be a little more straight forward. He is the kind of guy who appreciates that sort of thing, and I'm the kind of guy who is just that way. I'm not one to sugar coat things or beat around the proverbial bush, I'd much rather get to the point.

"What makes you say that?" I am fighting my natural impulse to break into a massive deduction of exactly how I know that, but I manage to bite it back. I know that people don't like it that I am able to deduce them down to nothing, then again I'd like them not to be so ridiculously transparent, but no one is getting what they want anytime soon I'm afraid. However, Andy is not near as transparent as the average person, he is by far one of the most difficult people I have ever come in contact with as far as getting a read on him.Sure, it was easy to deduce his current problem because I can relate, but the rest of him, all the other details, I'm finding them difficult to extract.

"I'm good at reading people". There, that wasn't too egotistical a response. I'm bloody brilliant and I know it, but I have found that is something else people don't care to hear. If there is anything I can accredit John for, it's my marginal grasp on what is socially acceptable in conversation. I'm pretty rubbish at social interactions even still, but I am a far cry better than what I used to be. Self improvement. Dull but necessary.

"Is that how you knew my name?"

"Yes, I observe that which is going on around me…..also it's hard to miss your name when thousands of young woman are screaming it" I give him a small smile to let him know that the comment is meant to be light hearted.

"Seems a legit a way as any to find out someone's name" He chuckles.

"Well, its effective at the very least"

We walk a little further in silence, but it's not awkward, it's just….companionable? Isn't that what people call it? Before I know it, we are across the street from 221B and my empty flat. The thought of going home to nothing makes my stomach hurt. It's either that, or the fact that I haven't eaten much in the last couple days. Ruddy body needs too much maintenance.

"This is where I live" I decide now is as good a time as any to inform him that we have managed to make our way to the location of my flat.

"Nice place" He looks towards the ground and I can't manage to get a clear grasp on what he is thinking. Well that's irritating. I decide to take a leap of faith, another thing I'm not used to having to do, and invite him in for a quick cup of tea before he has to get back.

"Thank you. You are welcome to come up for a quick cup of tea if you like, it's a bit chilly out here" I hold my breath waiting for the answer. I don't want him to think that my invitation has any implication other that a simple cup of tea. Honestly, I'm not one for hidden messages anyway, I say what I mean and I mean what I say.

"You know, why not. Sounds good" He gives me a small smile and I nod. We make our way up the stairs to MY flat, Sherlock's flat, no longer Sherlock and John's flat. The thought depresses me all over again and I busy myself in the kitchen to get rid of it.

"Please, have a seat, I'll put the kettle on" I boil the water and make the tea, he likes his with milk and sugar. Now, how come I can deduce how he likes his tea but when it comes to the important things I seem to be useless? I'm beginning to think this is the universes idea of a sick joke, like the entirety of it is having a good laugh at my expense. I hand him his tea and wait for him to question how I knew how he took it, but that particular question never comes, instead I'm hit with a question that I was not prepared to answer.

"So, does your boyfriend live here with you or…." He starts and trails off again. Honestly, I'm taken aback by a couple of things. First off, he's definitely not a simpleton like most people I have the displeasure of conversing with. He has been able to deduce the fact that I was gay without so much as a comment by me to go on. Now, I know that my sexuality is something that should, in all actuality, be extremely easy to deduce. But, the number of people who have been unable to do so are large in number. Second, I want to know what makes him think I have a boyfriend….do I really look that love sick over John? Lord please bury me alive if I do.

"I don't have a boyfriend, but impressive deduction on the gay part" I give credit where credit is due. Well, actually I don't, but I'm willing to make an exception in this case. He did good.

"That wasn't hard to figure out. Take it from someone who knows all about it"

"What made you think I had a boyfriend?" I can't resist asking, it is not an answer I can deduce, but it is an answer that I want to have.

"I don't know, I just assumed…..you look like you have a significant someone in your life"

"Not significant in the way I wish he was" I say before I can stop myself. This is not a path I want to go down, not right now. I can't afford to lose myself. He looks at me for a long minute and shakes his head.

"Looks like we have more in common than I thought".

"It would seem so".

I sit down on the sofa next to him, well when I say next to him I mean as far away as I can get while still sharing the same sofa. I notice him look off into the distance, and I know he is thinking about Ashley, I am suddenly overwhelmed with the need to comfort him in some way. I attribute this urge to the fact that I can relate whole-heartedly to what he's going through.

"You can talk about it, you know, if you want". It needed to be said, whether or not he chose to do so was up to him, but for once, I was going to put someone else's need to vent above my own. He looks at me with such an intensity that I fear for just a moment that I might have overstepped my boundary but his stare softens and I see his eyes get slightly damp.

"I really just don't know what to do" He states, still looking at me.

"That makes two of us" I chuckle and pat his shoulder briefly before returning my hands to my lap.

"Who will save us now?" He says, looking away from me briefly before looking back. My phone vibrates and I ignore it, it's probably John again, and just like before, I still don't have anything to say. I look up at Andy again and we make eye contact, and I'm left wondering, not for the first time this evening, what is going through this mans mind. All I do know is that when this day started, this was not how I pictured it ending 


	7. History

Andy

Do I really want to tell him? I really don’t want to go down that road, but maybe talking about it will help me at least relax a little. I’ve always been told I bottle things up; it’s just easier that way. I’m not used to opening up to other people. I generally talked to Juliet or Ashley, but right now I don’t feel like either would be very receptive to my problem.

“I think I knew I liked him when I first met him; this was years ago while I was getting the band together.” I leaned back again. I really wanted another cigarette, but I’m not sure it’s appropriate to light up in here.

Sherlock was silent for a moment. “You just didn’t know exactly what you felt.”

“I guess. I thought he was very ‘pretty’ for a male. He was talented, but being a musician it’s kind of a given. I knew immediately he’d be a perfect fit for the dream band I wanted to create. My bass player and backup vocalist.”

“He had bands on his own before yours.”

“Two that I know of, Orgasm and Stolen Hearts. He sang in both.”

I started chewing on my lip ring. “Over time we became best friends. We added all of our current band members and that never changed. During interviews and concerts we had a comfortable set up, that was generally us sitting together or performing fairly close together.”

He looked like he was contemplating something. “During your show tonight you were barely around one another.”

“It hurts to stay around him anymore. It was the one plus to being late to make-up today, He was gone when I got there.” It was painful to talk about. I didn’t want to. Ashley is my best friend.

“He’s a significant contributor to the band?”

He was asking just enough questions to let me answer how I wanted without prying. If I wanted to stop at any point, he wouldn’t push me to continue. “He’s probably the most important member of the band. All the guys are great and they all bring something to the band, but Ash… he’s the marketer and business aspect. He designed our “On Leather Wings” symbol that we all have tattooed on our arms. Black Veil Brides probably wouldn’t have taken off without his business work.”

“You created the band.”

“I did, but being the brain child behind something isn’t enough unless you have the means and knowledge to get it off the ground. I got it to Los Angeles, but had he not answered my craigslist add, I’m not sure where the band would be today.” I was trying really hard not to cry. Not only did I love Ashley, but I owed him everything for helping my dreams come true. I put my arm over my eyes. “I never wanted to do anything else as a child. From the time I could talk I loved to sing, I loved music. If I wasn’t doing this I have no idea where I would be, I have no other marketable talents. I think maybe as a kid I mentioned wanting to be batman once, but I doubt that would get me too far.”

“It seems your love for batman never left.” I heard him laugh.

I was still in my show clothes. “Batman is the most fantastic thing in life. I said once in an interview that if you can be anyone to always be yourself, unless you can be batman, in which case, always be batman. I always had a fascination with the dark and mysterious as a kid. Batman just stayed with me.”

“Your band is dark yet uplifting.”

“That was the goal. We were tired of hearing all of rock talk about being angry. As kids, all of us were different or picked on. We wanted to play about strength of self and the power of standing up for what’s right, even if you’re the only one standing.”  
I was getting tired of talking. Or I at least felt that way. I hadn’t spoken this much off stage in nearly a month. I was getting thankful for the two days off in London.

“Where else will you be playing?”

“We have two days off here in London, then we’ll be playing in Bristol, Birmingham, Liverpool, Manchester, Newcastle, Edinburgh, and Glasgow, then we’ll fly to Dublin for a show before going back to the US for a short break and then continuing on with the tour.”

I chewed on my lip ring more. I really wanted a few months off. I love performing and I love my fans but I think a few months off in LA is really what I need. I sat back up and rested my elbows on my thighs. It was getting late. I felt like I should leave, but at the same time I didn’t want to. Sherlock is sitting quietly watching me. What could he possibly be thinking?


	8. Years Ago

Sherlock

I'm not one for conversing, honestly I'm not one for anything that involves prolonged social interaction. So, it is safe to say that I was utterly shocked when I found myself enjoying conversing with Andy. 

There is something about him that, at the very least, peeks my interest, which is an accomplishment in and of itself considering there are very few who do. 

I feel….honored? Lord I'm just not good with this whole feelings and emotions thing!Yeah, honored that he is willing to open up to me about what he was going through. I know that feeling, and it makes it a little less unpleasant knowing that there is someone else out there who understands it. I'm just thinking about how I should say something to that effect when he speaks up. 

"I know I'm not the only one here with problems. You listened to me, I'll listen to you if you want to talk" I looked at him for a long moment, because it was like he just read my mind. That, for me, is more than a bit unsettling, I'm not used to anyone being able to read anything about me. 

"How do you know I've got problems?" I needed to know if I was really that transparent or if he really could read me when other people couldn't, or wouldn't as is often the case. 

"You pinpointed my problem so easily, man, it's obvious you can relate". He is right, again. Interesting. 

"It's my job, to know things about people, to read people, that's what I do" 

"You're changing the subject, but while we are on this, what do you do?" I knew this question would come eventually. He will probably look at me the same way everyone does when they hear what I do, one raised eyebrow and a look on their face that says 'yeah, right'. 

"I'm a consulting detective, the only one in the world. I assist the police when they are out of their depth and I also take private cases". I wait for the inevitable eyebrow raise, but it never comes. 

"So, you can just look at someone and read them?" He seems genuinely intrigued. That's new. 

"In a manner of speaking, yes. I observe"

"So, you knew about me before I told you?" I wish I could say that I did, but I'm not going to lie. 

"I knew your problem was unrequited love, but that was the extent of it. To my surprise, I am having a difficult time reading you. I knew the basics of your problem because I can relate all too well, as you already know. I'm impressed with your observation". That was about as close to giving another human being a compliment as I have ever gotten. What is so unique about him? 

"Coming from you I'm guessing that's high praise?" He laughs a little. He is not intimidated by my ability to deduce either. If I was looking for solid proof that he isn't like most people, that would have been it. 

"Take it how you will"

"Well I'll take it as praise from the consulting detective. Now, spill, what's got you down?" I swallow hard, I haven't told anyone about this, not a single person. That could be, in part, that I really don't have many people around who tolerate me long enough to talk to, but that's beside the point. I doubt I would have talked to anyone even if I'd had someone to talk to. I guess now is a good of time as any to change that, after all, he did open up to me. 

"Four years ago was when I met John Watson, we both needed a flat mate, a friend introduced us. We moved in together the day after we met, we just clicked, he put up with me when most people wouldn't. We became fast friends, which was odd because I don't really do the whole friend thing. As I'm sure you've noticed I'm not taking home the prize for successful social encounters anytime soon". 

"You're doing fine. Were you attracted to him from the beginning?" I had to give that some thought because, honestly, I really hadn't considered it. 

"Looking back on it now, perhaps I was, though I didn't know it back then. By all accounts I don't remember being aware of my feelings until I was standing on the roof of Saint Bart's getting ready to jump". His eyes grew big at that statement and I knew that I would have to explain. 

"Jump? Did you try to commit suicide?" 

"I'm not sure if try is the right word. I would say I was rather successful, at least most people thought so". He leans forward just slightly and looks at me, as if to make sure I'm actually here. "I'm alive, you don't have to be alarmed. You see, it's a complicated mess and a long story, but I'll give you the short version". 

"Go on, then". I could tell he was listening. He was, at the very least, interested in understanding how I committed successful suicide and even more so than that, interested in how I'm sitting here getting ready to tell him about it. 

"What I do, it's dangerous. Criminals don't much care for being caught and hunted down, and I'm good at my job. One of the greatest criminal minds I have ever had the pleasure to encounter threatened the only three people I considered my friends. He had snipers trained on them, ready to kill them, if I didn't kill myself. He made a few miscalculations and long story short, I faked my suicide. Only my brother and one other person knew, the others couldn't know, it would have put them in danger. John was one of them, he watched me fall from the roof and hit the ground, at least, he thought he did". I have to stop talking, tears threaten to spill from my eyes as I remember that day, replay it like a film in my head. 

I'm trying to compose myself enough to finish the story when I feel his hand on my shoulder. His touch is light, but comforting all the same and it makes me feel a little less angry at myself for half breaking down in front of another person. 

"You don't have to keep going". He wasn't pushing me to continue and I think that is the exact reason why I decided to. 

"It's fine, I'm fine". I cleared my throat. "I was away for two years. He had a web of criminals that were scattered all across the globe. By that time, I had come to terms with my feelings for John and I had planned to tell him when I returned. People always assumed we were a couple when we lived together, John corrected them at first, but eventually, he stopped. I didn't want to hope, but hope is what got me through. I ended up getting captured in Serbia, it was the last of the criminal heads. I knew once I put them away I could come home and explain everything to John. I was beaten and starved, near death, but I held on, I held on for John and I made it home". 

"What happened when you got back?" 

"I saw John for the first time since that day on the roof in a restaurant. He was there with a woman, a woman that turned out to be his fiancee, Mary. I was too late, he was with someone and he was happy. I couldn't tell him, so I just let things fall back into the way they used to be, minus sharing a flat with John. They are married now, I still consider John my best friend and he says the same for me. It's not fair for me to be upset with him, or for me to avoid him, he has no idea I'm in love with him and he never will". I stop and take a breath. It's out there now, everything, and if I was being honest with myself, it's like a thousand pounds has been lifted off my chest. 

"Man, I know exactly what that feels like. What makes John special, if you don't mind me asking?" I don't mind, not at all. 

"John never treated me like other people do. He was accepting from the beginning. He accepted me for exactly who I was, he didn't see my deduction ability as a flaw. He put up with a lot, I'm not an easy person to be around, I know that. But, John never abandoned me, it was never too much for him. He stood up for me, not that I needed him to, but he did anyway. He once chinned the Chief of Police for calling me a weirdo, which was the least offending of the names I am usually called" I laugh at the memory. Andy chuckles too. 

"He sounds like a decent guy, I'm sorry you are going through this". He meant it, I could tell. 

"As am I for you. Ashley sounds like a stand up guy as well". 

"He is". He rubs his hands across his face and looks up at me, one hand on each cheek, he really is good looking. Suddenly he sits up straight and smacks his thighs with his hands. 

"We need to cheer up, shake off the sadness, forget our problem, at least for a while". He says, he grins slightly. 

"What would you suggest?" He smiles a fraction more and I'm left, once again, with no idea what is going through this mans head. This could be interesting.


	9. The Simple Man Loves Food

Andy

“I think stuffing our faces with the unhealthiest food we can find sounds like the best idea.” I jumped up from the couch.

He just stared at me a moment. I think I took him by surprise. He stood up and led me to the door. “Food it is then.”

As soon as we were out the door I lit up a cigarette. I’d already smoked an entire pack tonight. This was the first one out of my new pack. “You know when we’re on tour, we never actually get to see anything, but what we can see from our bus windows.”

“That’s rather unfortunate.”

“We’ve gotten lucky a few times to have days off, where we can shop and sight see, more often than not we’re too tired to do anything. The times I went anywhere were when I was with Juliet. She’d make me get out of bed. Most of the time we’re off everyone spends drinking or partying. I probably do it the least out of everyone and since Jinxx is married he doesn’t do much as well.” I started another cigarette, still glancing around for food.

“I can attest that I don’t spend much time out myself as well.”

“Trust me; it gets old after a while. I had a big bout of partying before I met Juliet. I’d go out with Ashley and get drunk all the time. You wouldn’t believe the types of women he’d pick up and bring back to the bus.”

He looked at me perplexed.

“They all look like they’ve been in some kind of porn movie at some point. Fake boobs, blonde hair and all far too desperate for their own good. He goes out with CC a lot now. He’s always just telling Ash to pick one because they all have the same fishnets.” I laughed.

We finally came to a restaurant. Angelos, it said. Sounded as good as any. I really just wanted to eat. I’m starving. We took a seat at a booth by the window.

“Sherlock!” And old man shouted. He handed us menus. “Anything you want is on the house for you. And your date… This one is much different than the other fellow you came in with all the time.”

“I don’t think this is a date.” I chuckled. “We’re just hanging out.” I saw him smile from the corner of my eye.  
The old man laughed again. “Whatever you say. Still whatever you want is free, just let me know.” He walked off and left us to order.

“I apologize on his behalf.” Sherlock said looking at the menu. “He thinks that anytime I come in here I have a date. This was generally where John and I came to eat.”

I laughed. “It’s fine. I’m surprised that was his statement. Generally, people ask me why I go around dressed like this. Besides, he seems like he has good intentions.”

“He does indeed.”

“What’s good here?”

“I haven’t found anything distasteful quite yet.”

His accent was pleasant to listen to. I’ve travelled around to so many different countries I’ve been immune to the fact, that I hear them, but don’t really listen. I need to learn to be more attentive, I think. I ran my hand through my hair when the old man came back.

“What can I get for you Sherlock?”

“Shrimp pasta and wine please.”

“And your date?”

I chuckled again. “I’ll take whatever this French word thing is, some wine, and this brownie ice cream desert.” I sucked at ordering at restaurants. I always ordered delivery. It was easy. Especially, in LA, all the places near my apartment knew what I wanted when I said my name.

“Okay. I’ll get that right out.” He took the menus and left.

His phone rang again. He ignored it. “Someone’s popular tonight.”

“Not particularly. It’s either John or that Oaf Lestrade. Neither of which I feel like speaking to at the moment.”

“I don’t think any members of the band call. We all text. It’s less annoying I guess.”

“It is when you’re in the middle of something.”

Our food was brought out. I have no idea what my entrée was, but it looked good and fattening, that was the plan. Eat and forget. It was an interesting sight to see. Me dressed in my performance clothes: black skinnies, belts, wristbands, and my cutout shirt covered in tattoos, with this guy dressed in a suit and scarf. I wonder what the people who were glancing our direction were thinking. Obviously, none of them knew who I was.

“How do you deal with the publicity?” Sherlock asked after a sip of wine.

“Oh, well in any country aside from the US, it’s generally not an issue. Back home I wear sunglasses a lot. And sometimes I run.” I laughed. “I wear hoodies when I go outside the bus to smoke before performances so people don’t recognize me.”

“I wonder if people realize that celebrities don’t appreciate being hunted down?”

“Most of my fan base is pretty respectful, but you get some. It’s just like damn give me some privacy. I’m just a guy who likes to sing you know. If I didn’t perform for them, I could be just some guy walking down the street. I’m called a savior, a hero, but I’m nobody’s hero.”

“It’s true indeed. No matter what any of us do, we are all just human.”  
I finished my food, like a pig and sat back, he did the same. I’m not sure if I’m boring or not. I’m really not an interesting person. I just can’t seem to figure this guy out, not that it matters anyways; I leave in two days.


	10. Chocolate Cake

Sherlock

I will never understand why Angelo assumes everyone I bring in here is my date. I'm not really the dating type, well I didn't use to be, until I met John. He was the first person who really struck my interest and kept it, though I could still easily deduce him, he wasn't boring. 

Andy isn't boring either, he's very interesting, actually. I can't easily deduce him, not like I could John, and that is both disturbing and intriguing. I don't like not being able to read people, the fact that I can deduce anything in seconds is one of my only redeeming qualities. 

It's not that I can't deduce Andy at all, I can, just not as quickly as I can most others, and not everything. With most people, I see their entire life story in a matter of seconds, there isn't anything they can keep from me and it is hideously transparent when they try. 

I am pulled from my thoughts when Angelo returns to the table. We are both stuffed and he is about to offer us desert, see I could deduce that without even looking at him. 

"Did you two enjoy your food?" 

"It was great" We both managed to say at the same time. Well, that was weird. 

"Look at you two, already sharing thoughts! How about desert, hm?" Here he goes again and I find myself hoping that Andy isn't too embarrassed. 

"What do you think Sherlock? Desert?" I am full, so full, I have eaten more tonight than I have in days already. But, I find myself, for reasons I'm not interested in looking into at the moment, wanting to prolong our time together. 

"Desert would be lovely, Angelo" 

"What would you boys like?" 

"I will have a triple chocolate cake, Andy?" I hand him the desert menu. 

"That sounds good. I'll have the cake too" He smiles and hands Angelo the desert menu. 

"Coming right up" He takes the menu, gives us a wink, and goes on his way. 

"Again, I apologize on his behalf. I don't know where he gets the idea that everyone I bring here is a date" I feel like I need to at least attempt to explain him. 

"It's no big deal, really. I think it's funny" He chuckles and I'm actually relieved. "How do you know him?" 

"I got him off a murder charge a few years back. He still went to prison for housebreaking, but he only spent six months instead of life. He's been very kind to me, if a bit annoying. He means well, though" 

"He's a cool guy, I'm sure he does" He smiles and Angelo returns with the cake. 

By the time we finish our cake and say goodbye to Angelo it is going on eleven, when did it get so late? 

"Would you like to take a cab?" I don't know what he's thinking, he is probably ready to get back to his hotel. 

"Actually, it's nice, you just want to walk back to your place?" I'm surprised, most people don't voluntarily spend this much time around me. 

"That sounds quite nice. Perhaps walk off some of this food" I laugh. Did I really just try and make a joke? I don't joke. What is wrong with me? 

He chuckles and nods his head. Well, apparently it wasn't a terrible joke. I don't feel so bad now. 

We walk in silence, taking in our surroundings, watching cars and cabs pass us by on the busy streets of London. I notice out of the corner of my eye that a black car is getting ready to pull up on the curb next to us. I know exactly who it is, and I roll my eyes to accompany my very audible sigh. I hear the car door shut. 

"You could be a little less obvious, Mycroft" If he thinks I don't know it's him then he's losing his touch. 

"What?" Andy looks at me and I can tell he has no idea who I'm talking to. He must not have noticed the car. 

"My brother, Mycroft, has decided to join us, or rather he has decided to butt in where he doesn't belong" 

"Oh, come now, Sherlock. So hostile. I'm just checking in on you. Who's your friend" Mycroft steps in front of us, effectively stopping our walk. 

"Hey, I'm Andy" He looks Mycroft in eye and shakes his hand. He's not intimidated by him in the least, good. 

"Mycroft Holmes, Sherlock's older brother" Mycroft shakes his hand and looks him over.

"I won't keep either of you, I just wanted to see to it that you are still doing alright" He looked at me and I knew exactly what he was referring too and suddenly I see red. John, it must have been John, he must have called him when I wouldn't pick up my phone. 

"John called you" 

"John called your brother?" Andy's eyes get a little wider and I give him a nod. 

"You aren't answering his calls" Mycroft said like that was a perfectly acceptable excuse to hunt him down and ruin his night. 

"I have no reason to. John is not my keeper. Shouldn't he be focused on his wife" I can hear the disgust in my voice as the words come out and I curse myself for not reining my anger in better. I'm not even sure if I'm more angry with Mycroft for interrupting my night or with John for calling him in the first place. 

"Always so aggressive. What is this all about Sherlock?" I avert my gaze. There is no way I'm telling Mycroft about this. He would blab to John and I can't have that. Andy must notice, he is more observant than most ordinary people, because he steps between us. 

"He doesn't have to answer that. It's his business who he does and doesn't accept phone calls from" My mouth drops open. He just stood up to Mycroft. I'm most certain that the good Queen herself would shrink in Mycroft's presence. 

"Do you know who I am, Mr. Biersack?" Mycroft fixed his eyes on Andy. He was trying to intimidate him, though deep down, he was impressed with his bravery. Mycroft respected someone who had the guts to challenge him, I knew that from experience. 

"A mother fucker who needs to mind his own business?" I had to stifle a laugh, not only because of the comment, but because of the look of utter shock on Mycroft's face that appeared as a result of the comment. 

"Mycroft is constitutionally incapable of minding his own business" Andy laughed and Mycroft scowled. 

"Well, it seems you are just fine. I'll relay the information to John" Mycroft pointed his umbrella at me as he opened the car door. "If you fall into old habits, Sherlock, I will have no choice but to intervene. Enjoy your evening. Lovely to have met you, Mr. Biersack" Then he was gone, thank God. 

"Sorry about him. He's a nosy bugger" I begin to walk again and Andy follows suit. 

"I can tell, damn. What did he mean by old habits?" I was really hoping he wouldn't catch that. That is a part of my past I am not keen on talking about. I've been clean since I met John. 

"I have had my share of issues in the past, but those days are gone. I don't know why he still does this" I am hoping that this will be a good enough explanation for now. I really don't want to go into my past, it wasn't a good time. 

"Hey, I get it. We all have a past. It's nice that he cares. Even if he does have a funny way of showing it" I know that he is right, but I'm not about to say anything nice about Mycroft. 

"Is it?" I roll my eyes and he laughs and smacks my arm. 

"He's your brother, come on" 

"He is, unfortunately" He smacks my arm again and I try to keep a straight face and fail miserably. 

Before either of us realize it, we are standing outside 221B Baker Street. I look at Andy and find that he is looking at me too. I wish I could deduce him better, I just can't seem to get a handle on what he is thinking. He looks like he is thinking hard about something, but God help me I don't know what it is. 

Andy is different, he is different from any other person I have ever had the pleasure….and sometimes displeasure….of meeting. He has proven that quite a few times over tonight. He could very possibly decide to say or do something that I could not predict and prepare for…..that's not good. Not for someone like me.


	11. The Mortician's Daughter

Andy

I just looked at him for a moment before I lit up a cigarette. “Time flies doesn’t it?”

He glanced at his phone, presumably looking at the time. “Indeed it does.” He seemed to be deep in thought as he looked at me. It was probably my eyes he was focused on, they always seemed to be the first thing that caught people’s attention. We were both just leaning against the wall outside of his apartment. I felt content for the first time in several weeks. There wasn’t a huge need to fill the silence; it had been a long time since I could just enjoy someone’s company. I felt the urge to sing; a song I haven’t performed live since our first tour after our debut album.

“I open my lungs dear. I sing this song at funerals… no rush.” I took a drag from my cigarette. These lyrics heard a thousand times, just plush.” The sky was beautiful. I wish that they looked like this back home in LA. “A baby boy you’ve held so tightly, this pain it visits almost nightly. Missing hotel beds, I feel your touch.”

I looked over to Sherlock, he had this admirable look in his eyes, was that towards me? 

“That song is brilliant.”

“Yeah? I haven’t performed that song publically in almost five years. I wrote it for the girl I was dating at the time.”

“Not, Juliet.”

“A girl named Scout, or that’s what we all called her. She was the first girlfriend I ever had.”

It fell silent again, so I continued my song. “I will await dear, a patience of eternity, my crush. A universal still, no rust. No dust will ever grow on this frame, one million years and I will say your name. I love you more than I can ever scream.” I snuffed the butt of my cigarette out with my foot. “We booked our flight those years ago, I said I loved you as I left you. Regrets still haunt my hollow head, But I promised you that I will see you again, again.”

I heard Sherlock open his mouth to speak. I beat him to his question.

“I don’t regret anything, not about that part of my life anyway. I just knew when I left to go to LA things may change with Scout and I, they did; but that’s life at it’s finest, ya know.”

He seemed content with my answer. “I sit here and smile dear. I smile because I think of you and I blush. These bleeding hollow dials, this fuss. A fuss is made of miles and travel. Roadways are but stones and gravel. A bleeding heart can conquer every crutch.”

“You were a teenager when you wrote this. It has that emotion to it.”

“I did. I was seventeen when they lyrics came to me. It was a year or so later it was performed for the band’s first album, but really, I’m only 23. It wasn’t all that long ago. I still feel the emotion in the lyrics.”

I closed my eyes. “We booked our flight those years ago. You said you loved me as you left me. Regrets still haunt your saddened head, But I promised you that I will see you. We booked our flight those years ago. I said I loved you as I left you. Regret's no longer in my head, But I promised you and now I'm home again, again, again, I'm home again, again, again. I'm home again.” A smile came to me as I finished the song. I don’t remember why I stopped performing it. I loved our upbeat, kick-ass songs; but the slower, emotional ones always got to me.

“You are one talented individual. You don’t recognize your brilliance.” He smiled at me.

“Maybe I don’t. I feel like just an ordinary man.”

Sherlock was about to speak again, but was cut off.

“Andy!” I heard my name shouted from down the street.

I chuckled. “It looks as if my posse has found me.” It was the rest of the band.

“There you are, Bright Eyes.” That was Ashley’s nickname for me. It looks like CC and Ash have sobered up already.

“We wondered where you went.” Jinxx smiled, obviously he meant Ash and CC wondered where I went. He and Jake were minding their own business I’m sure.

“Who’s this dude?” CC gestured to Sherlock.

“This is Sherlock. I ran into him behind the venue, we’ve just been hanging out. Trying to kill some time.” I didn’t want anyone’s or my privacy invaded, so I kept the answers short. Hopefully, they would take it and leave it.

“We’ll I’m glad to see you didn’t get kidnapped by any fangirls.” Ashley laughed hysterically.

I laughed back. “Ash we all know it’s you that has to worry about being kidnapped by women.”

Jinxx and Jake joined in the laughing. We all knew it was true. I felt bad having the guys come up and interrupt the night, but what could I do? It’s not like I knew they were looking for me. “Andy, we’re gonna head back to the hotel to play Call of Duty, you need to come play with us.” CC urged.

“You mean kick all your asses thoroughly?"

“Whatever Andrew.” CC laughed.

“You guys head back. I’ll be right there.”

They turned to head back to the hotel. I saw Ashley turn to look before he continued on.

“Thanks for hanging out with me tonight. It’s been fun. It’s not often I meet people outside of the tour group and band.”  
“I agree. It’s nice to do something different now and again.”

I smiled and patted him on the shoulder before I turned and ran to catch up with the band. I glanced over my shoulder as I made it down the street, only to see him still standing outside his door looking really confused.


	12. I need to go to my Mind Palace

Sherlock

I stand idol in front of 221B for longer than I intend as I watch him run down the street to catch up with the rest of his band mates. I blink a few times to bring myself around and walk inside my flat, my empty flat, my John-less flat. I know I need to call him, he's my best friend and I'm not treating him fairly…..since when do I care about this kind of stuff? 

It's John, he has that effect on me. Years of living with him humanized me and I have had a difficult time keeping emotions at bay ever since. Before John I could be cold and emotionless, nobody cared, people didn't like me (many still don't) and that was (and is) okay. I could easily protect myself when I could bury anything that made me weak….emotions are weak. Sentiment is a chemical defect found on the losing side, and am I losing. 

If it wasn't enough that I had this whole John ordeal to work out, now I have another puzzle….and his name is Andy Biersack. I'm finding my lack of ability to read him increasingly irritating. On top of that, I just don't understand why I'm feeling like this…..it's an anxious feelings, a stomach twist, almost like I can't breath. Maybe I'm getting sick? That would be very odd because I never get sick. 

My phone rings and I'm pulled out of my inner turmoil, that is until I look at the screen. It's John. I know I need to answer it, he is my best friend and he's worried. So I decide to take a couple deep breaths to calm myself and I pick up the phone. 

"Sherlock Holmes" I say like I don't know who's calling.

"Sherlock! Oh thank God, it's John! I've been worried sick, why won't you pick up your phone?" John sounds stressed and relieved at the same time. 

"I'm fine, John. For God's sake, I'm not a child" You don't live here anymore, you abandoned me for Mary, you have no right to keep tabs on me. 

"No, but your Sherlock Holmes and that's close enough"

"I'm not even going to dignify that with a response. Now if your quite done I've things to do…."

"Sherlock, I talked to Mycroft" John interrupts. I roll my eyes, will he ever learn to mind his own business?

"And I care because?" 

"He said you’ve met someone…..that you have feelings for them. Is that true?" WHAT. THE. HELL. 

"I am going to kill him and make it look like an accident" 

"So it's true, then?" 

"I feel no more for this individual than I do for anyone else" Do I? 

"But you did meet someone?" 

"I meet people everyday, John. It's hardly a big deal" 

"Well Mycroft seems to think it's a pretty big deal" 

"Mycroft is a nosy bugger that apparently has nothing better to do than interfere in my personal affairs" That part is true. 

"He's concerned about you, Sherlock. He seems to think you feel pretty strongly for this person, whoever they are, he wouldn't say" Well, at least he kept that to himself. John doesn't know my sexuality and Mycroft is hardly the proper person to tell him, and I'm not ready to. 

"As usual, Mycroft is reading more into a situation than there is. I simply met someone on my way to get coffee this afternoon and spent some time with them earlier this evening. There is nothing more to it than that" That part is true too, isn't it?

"So you made a friend?" Christ, will this line of questioning never end. 

"I'm slightly offended at your assumption that I cannot make friends" 

"Well, Sherlock, you aren't the most…." I decide it's time for him to shut up. 

"Shut up, John, for God's sake. I can make friends if I choose, I can do anything if I choose, you know who I am. Just because I choose to distance myself does not mean I'm incapable should the occasion arise. Contrary to popular belief I am a living, breathing person, however unfortunate that may be. I have feelings and emotions, despite my best effort to rid myself of them, and I don't appreciate the assumption that I can make no friends outside of you!" 

"Sherlock…I…I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you" 

"You never mean to, yet somehow you manage just fine. Look, I don't have time for this tedious nonsense. Is there something else you need, if not there isn't then this conversation is over" I don't mean to be so harsh with him, I just can't deal with this right now. He nor Mycroft have any right to question or interfere in my personal life. 

"Sherlock, I know something is up. I'm not going to push you alright, but don't shut me out. Please" I feel myself thaw a little, I really need to get it together. I know deep down there is no reason for me to be treating John like this. I sigh.

"I'll be alright John. I met a person who could stand to be around me for more than two seconds and we spent an evening…hanging out? Isn't that what you people call it? Anyway, that's it. There is nothing there. I'm Sherlock Holmes, remember? Married to my work" That is something I would do good to remember. 

"I know what you're saying, Sherlock. You've been saying the same thing for years. But Mycroft seems to think otherwise. I wanted to talk to you myself instead of just taking his word for it" 

"Well, take my word for it. I'm fine, I don't have romantic feelings towards anyone, and Mycroft needs to mind his own business" 

"Okay, Sherlock. If that's what you say, then that's the word I will take. Just know that if you need anything, or if you want to talk, I'm here for you" No you're not, you are with Mary. You are there for her, you left me alone. 

"I assure you I have my life completely under control. I don't need assistance"

"Whatever, Sherlock. I'll talk to you later then? Call me more often would you? You worry me sick"

"Sure, yeah, whatever, goodbye" I can almost hear John's responding eye roll as he hands up the phone. 

My phone rings again, it's Mycroft. 

"What do you want?" I answer. 

"Did you talk to John?" 

"As a matter of fact, yes. Next time you decide to tell John I have feelings for someone, do make sure that it's actually true. I have no more feelings for Andy than I do for anyone else"

"We both know that's not true" I can hear the smugness in Mycroft's voice and it angers me. I am me, I think that I would know if I have developed some sort of emotional attachment to Andy. We spent a short amount of time together, he wasn't boring, and that's it. 

"Mind your own business, Mycroft" 

"I'm just looking out for you, brother mine" 

"Next time you interfere in my personal life I swear on Anderson I will shove that pretentious umbrella right up your arse" 

"Always so aggressive. Did you ever consider the fact that I might just want to help you?" 

"Did you ever consider the fact that I don't need nor want your help?" 

"We will see…." He starts to say something else but I hang up on him. 

Suddenly, I'm exhausted and frankly, sick of talking to people, and in desperate need of a cigarette. I slap on a nicotine patch instead and decide that I need to spend some time in my mind palace. I have a lot of information to process and I'm going to have to create a room for Andy. 

Mycroft's words come unbidden to my mind 'We both know that's not true' and I push them away. Andy is not boring, he is intriguing and difficult to deduce, someone like that requires a room in the mind palace so that I have space to store further information if ever I were to acquire any. It's not often someone catches my interest and gives me a challenge in deduction. See? It's for science, for learning, and for bettering my skills. It is NOT because I have any sort of emotional attachment to him, so Mycroft can just piss right off.


	13. Nothing

Andy

It’s five thirty in the morning and I have yet to sleep. The joys of being an insomniac. I was up all night, my brain running a mile a minute and no way to shut it off. I kept wondering about Sherlock’s look as I left last night. What was going on in his head? I can’t get a decent read on the guy. My phone buzzed, Jake just tweeted about missing Ella. At least he has someone to miss.

I stood in the shower and let the hot water attempt to clear my mind. I wish I could have a moment of nothing, even if it was just a few seconds. To have nothing going on in my head would be great. I think I might actually go do something today; the Thames River runs through London. It’ll be quiet and relaxing. I can smoke and do nothing all day.

I put on a white KISS t-shirt underneath my black jean vest that read “Prophet” on the back. Black skinnies rolled up to just above where my boots came, a batman sweatband on my upper arm, a monster one on my lower, and a studded belt. Everyone would know who I was, hopefully they’d leave me alone.

I went down to breakfast to find Jake already awake. “Hey man, what are you doing up so early?”

“He took a drink of his coffee. I was up talking to Ella. I really miss her. I can’t wait to get back to the states.”

“At least you have someone to miss.”

He smiled at me. “Missing someone isn’t always fun, Andy.” He looked at me questioningly. “Can I ask you something?”  
I shrugged. “Why not?”

“What’s got you so off lately. You seem like you’re in a slump. I mean, I know you haven’t said anything, but I can tell something’s got you bothered.”

I guess someone should know. “I’m in love with Ashley.” Somehow he didn’t looked shocked. “I told him and got shot down.” I tried to laugh, but it was half-hearted.

“Ah, I had a hunch with how you’d been toward him, but I didn’t want to make assumptions. Don’t let it get you too bent out of shape, dude. Ashley is a nice guy, but you know how he is. Do you think you could handle him going out all the time and whatnot. He’s a partier. Not the type to settle down.”

“Doesn’t stop the attraction, Jake.” I swirled my straw around in my coffee.

“I’m not saying it does. I’m saying, Andy, that you deserve someone that will settle down with you. You need someone who can travel with the band, or someone who will be loyal to you and wait for you to come home from tour.” He smiled at the picture of Ella on his phone.

“You mean a dog?” I laughed.

Jake laughed with me. “Well, I suppose they are loyal and wait. There’s someone out there for you, man. Promise. Just don’t treat Ash any different, I haven’t talked to him, but I can tell he’s hurt that you haven’t talked to him much lately.”  
I muttered. “He’s still my best friend.”

“Of course he is. That will never change. We all love you, Andy.”

They may love me, but not in the way I wished. Like Jake said, I want someone that I can come home to. Real breakfast tasted great. Way better than just cereal from the bus.

“What are you gonna do today?” Jake stood up; he was getting ready to go back to his room.

“Probably go to the River and just hang out by the docks and stuff today.”

“Have fun.”

It wasn’t long before me and two packs of cigarettes found our way to the river. I took up residence on the bench and just sat there. I had a nice view, nicotine, and calm, this was going to be my day. Maybe I’d get the urge to write down a new song or actually fall asleep. I laughed to myself… that was unlikely. Cigarette number 1.

I had actually managed to doze off when I was interrupted.

“Hello again, Mr. Biersack.” He sat down next to me on the bench.

“Mycroft, right?” I looked toward him. “What do you want?”

“Just a conversation.”

“It better be good. I was finally about to get some sleep.” Fuck off, seriously.

“How is my brother?”

“Sherlock?

“Of course.” He smiled.

“He was fine yesterday.”

“What are you to him?” So, he was being nosy was he?

“We’re acquaintances.” That much was true.

He was looking at me curiously. “Mr. Biersack, I believe you are yet unaware of your feelings for my dear little brother.”  
“Feelings? We’ve met one time.”

“That’s enough for someone to make an impression. You’ve certainly made one on him, he is yet aware of it as well.”  
This guy was really weird, well for my standards anyway. I know I’m considered a weirdo. I’m sure the women and kids that walk by change to the opposite side of the street that I’m on.

“How is it any of your business anyway?” I made it clear I was pissed.

“Sherlock is always my business. He is my brother.”

“I beg to differ, I’m sure he would disagree with that statement.” I balled my fists. “Don’t make me hit you.”

“Calm down Andrew. I mean no harm.” He obviously has done his research or great assumption skills. I’d say both.  
“Then mind your own business.”

“I’ll take my leave now. Remember though, Sherlock is always my business. I’ll be watching you two.”

I lay back on the bench. Mycroft definitely cares about his brother, but he sure has a weird way of showing it. That’s for sure. Cigarette number 2. Cigarette number 3. Sleep needs to come. I turned on my side and watched the river and horizon. At some point on cigarette number 4. I fell asleep.


	14. Coincidence

Sherlock

Somewhere between dreams and reality, I hear a faint beeping noise. I'm dreaming about something good, something warm and comforting, but the longer that beep continues, the fuzzier it gets. 

Finally, the constant beeping pulls me back to life and I realize I fell asleep on the couch last night. I must have dozed off while I was in my mind palace and not bothered to get up and go to bed. Hmm what was I dreaming about? It was pleasant. 

I abandon the thought in favor of finding the incessant beeping and halting it. I look over into the kitchen and notice my phone is lighting up and beeping….well that's what the noise is then. 

When I stand up to get it I am a bit surprised to see that there are other parts of me that seem to be much more awake than I am at this moment. Great. I was probably dreaming about John, that's just fantastic. I'm in no mood to take care of it right now, so I ignore it and make my way to my phone, it's Lestrade and he's sent me ten different text in the last five minutes. 

Well, at least I don't have to ignore my little wake up problem any longer, one look at a text from Lestrade took care of that. He needs me at a crime scene and for once, it actually sounds like it has the potential to be interesting. Brilliant! It's been a while since I've had a good case! I shower and dress quickly and catch a cab to the crime scene. It seems they have just found a body on the banks of the Thames. 

Lestrade and his team of idiots are all standing over the body when I get there and I resist the urge to push them all out of the way. Instead I take a pair of latex gloves from Lestrade's car and walk over to where they are all standing. 

"Pulled him out of the Thames just ten minutes ago" Lestrade informs me. As if I hadn't deduced that already. 

"Did you find any identification?" 

"No, he didn't have a wallet or anything on him when we found him" Lestrade rubs his hand over his face in frustration….My God if he would just THINK his life would be so much easier. 

"He works at the Bank of England, he's a stock broker. You can tell from his clothes and the state of his hands. He is in his early forties and has been unhappily married for fifteen years. He's a compulsive cheater who's mistress had just given an ultimatum. It was either leave his wife or lose her" I'm not finished yet but I stop, knowing Lestrade will need time to come to the wrong conclusion so that I can tell him as much and continue on. 

"So he said no and she killed him" What did I say? Wrong conclusion. 

"Of course she didn't, he left his wife" Wait for it……

"So his wife killed him" Wrong again, like always. 

"No, she was cheating too, she's glad to be rid of him. Frankly, I can see why too. Anyways, he was strangled, his killer is a man. More specifically his drug dealer, whom he obviously didn't have the money to pay considering he was attempting to steal two grams of cocaine. He got caught and his dealer strangled him from behind, you can tell by the placement of the marks on his neck, he was strangled with a piece of rope. Rope from the abandoned warehouse two blocks to the east, you know where it's at. The dealer will be there and you will find our man's dna on him as well as his wallet. Now go quietly and try not to screw anything up, I'm not in the mood for a foot pursuit today" 

"Thank you, Sherlock" Lestrade gives a half smile and leaves with his crew of simpletons to catch the killer. 

Well, that wasn't interesting at all, bugger. I thought I would at least get to spend half the day on a good case, one of these days Lestrade will stop overreacting to little things. This case was child's play. 

I'm not ready to go back to the flat just yet, no good experiments to do anyway, so I decide to go for a walk a long the Thames. It's been a while since I came out here and just took in the view. I appreciate the way London looks, it's river and sky, it's beautiful buildings and busy streets. 

I take a breath and exhale, I was away from this beautiful place for two years and I find myself needing to just breath it in, to just stop and look at all it has to offer, just to reassure myself that I really am back here. 

I walk quietly for quite some time, allowing myself to relax into my surroundings and to just enjoy being. I notice a man sleeping on a bench just a few feet ahead and I've the strangest feeling that I've seen him before, but I can't tell because the view of his face is obstructed by the arm of the bench. Eh, he's probably just someone I've seen around here before and didn't bother deleting. 

I continue walking, mesmerized by the movement of the water as a boat passes by, lost in the ripples of the water and my own thoughts. 

"Sherlock?" I spin around, startled out of my own head by a familiar voice. Oh, come one now, I must be dreaming, because there is no way I am looking at Andy right now. 

"Andy? Are you alright?" It is Andy. He looks tired and…..conflicted? Maybe. He just seems like he has been putting a lot of thought into something and it's upset his mind a bit. I know the feeling. 

"I'm fine, dozed off watching the river" 

"It's easy to do. I'm surprised to run into you again, I definitely didn't expect to see you here"

"Yeah, what a coincidence" He looks at me and gives me a tired smile. 

"The universe is rarely so lazy" I say it without thinking. Mycroft always used to tell me that, it's the one thing that has ever come out of his mouth that I actually agree with. 

"What's that?" 

"Oh, sorry. It's just something Mycroft used to always tell me when we were younger. 'Sherlock what do we say about coincidences' he would smart and eventually I learned what he was going to say next, which was 'the universe is rarely so lazy'" I try to explain and hope I don't confuse him more with that ridiculous explanation. Luckily, he looks amused. 

"Mycroft, he's something else isn't he?" I already know this question is a segue into something I probably don't want to talk about. 

"Fat?" I have to stifle a giggle at my answer. 

"Sherlock! He's not fat though…." He smirks slightly

"He used to be, when we were younger. If you ever have the displeasure of running into him again, ask him about cake" He laughs and so do I, a laugh is always good when it's at Mycroft's expense. 

"Wish I would have known that little bit of information when he was here earlier" He said, still giggling. I, however, am not still giggling. 

"Please tell me you are referring to when he stalked us on the street last night" He isn't, and I know he isn't, but I'm holding onto that one last string of hope that says he is. 

"Unfortunately no, he was here earlier today, I'm fairly certain THAT was not a coincidence" He said and shook his head. 

"I'm going to fucking kill him" I never curse, ever. But I am so mad right now that I just don't care. 

"Did you just say fuck?" He quirks an eyebrow at me. Yeah, I know, I don't look like someone who stoops to the use of explicits, but God help me, I'm mad as hell. 

"Yes, I did. What did that nosy bastard want?" 

"Information about you" He looks at the ground and I know he isn't telling me something. Better still, I know exactly what it is he isn't telling me because it's the same thing that Mycroft said to me. 

"It seems he had similar conversations with the both of us" 

"Did he talk to you too?" 

"I had the displeasure of speaking with him over the phone last night and now he's going to have the displeasure of speaking to me face to face. If he thought I was kidding when I told him I'd shove his umbrella up his arse if he meddled in my life again, he is going to find out different" I am absolutely livid. How DARE he come to Andy and try and tell him how he feels. It's bad enough he does that to me! We met one time, two now, and we get along. That doesn't mean there is anything else! Does it? 

He laughs. "Funny as that is, I think he's just concerned for you. That's not saying I didn't want to sock him a good one earlier, though. I know you don't like him in your business. You made the quite clear last night when he showed up" 

I can't help but smile. It's nice that he remembered, and quite frankly, anyone who wants to punch Mycroft is alright with me. "That would have given him something to think about. As it stands, he is about to get something to think about. I warned him"

"Hey, just have a seat alright. Like I said, I think he's just concerned for you. Jake, he's concerned for me too. He talked to me earlier about what's going on with me. We are both going through a tough time, you know? It's not a bad thing to have people out there that care" He is right and I know he is. But, I don't want Mycroft's help. He's the last person I want to go to about this and I can't go to John. I sit down next to him. 

"I'm glad you have people that care. Truly I am. I'm just….well I'm not much of a talker when it comes to my personal life, my life outside of my work. And trust me when I tell you, Mycroft is not the person I want trying to help me out. He's too nosy already" I smile to ease the seriousness a bit. 

"You know, I'm not much of a talker either, so I get it. We do need to get it out though, now and then. I'm not big on talking to the guys in the band about it, it's just a little weird. I can see that you are the same way with the people you know, because they know John" He hit the nail on the head right there. I don't want John to know and I can't be sure that Mycroft won't tell him and I'm certainly not going to tell Lestrade. 

"It's just easier not to talk about it than to risk it getting back to John. I can't have him knowing, I simply can't" I can feel emotion coming unbidden and filling me up. Now is not the time to get emotional, not out here in public and not in front of Andy. I swallow and shake my head in an attempt to bring it down. 

"Hey, it's alright to be upset about it. God knows I get that way, it comes at the worst times too" He smiles slightly and pats me knee. 

"I does, doesn't it?" I take his hand that's still resting on my knee and squeeze it gently and quickly before letting it go. In that moment, it was the only way I could express to him how much I appreciated his company. He smiled and nodded his head, he understood, thank God. 

"Hand me your phone" I dig my phone out of my pocket and hand it to him. He types something into it and then hands it back. "I put my number in, if you want to talk about John, or you just want to talk in general, you can call or text me" 

I was momentarily shocked, not for the first, second, or third time, by him and his willingness to continue to associate with me. "Thank you, now hand me your phone". He took it out of his pocket and handed it to me without question. I put my number in, just as he had, and handed it back. "Same goes for you. Call or text, anytime". 

"I will definitely hold you to that" 

"I look forward to it. I must go now, but it was lovely to see you again. Truly" I stand up and he stands with me. 

"Keep in touch" He smiles and touches my shoulder. 

"Of course" I return the smile, pat his hand, and walk away. Despite Mycroft's never ending meddling, I'm happy to have gotten a chance to talk with Andy again. He's still a never ending mystery, but it seems we have the ability to keep in touch if we so choose, so perhaps I will be able to figure him out eventually. 

I stop at the coffee shop, that coffee shop, and actually get a coffee there this time. I sip it slowly as I sit in the back of the cab that is taking me to the Diogenes club. I may be happy to have seen Andy, but I'm still amazingly pissed at Mycroft. 

When I arrive, I walk quietly to his office and enter without knocking. He's sitting at his desk, which is typical, and looks up upon my entry. 

"Sherlock" 

"Where's the umbrella, you best get up and bend over because I warned you" 

"Ah, I see you've spoken with Andrew" 

"How observant of you" I roll my eyes. 

"Tell me, did you have a good conversation"

"I'll let you know when that's any of your business" 

"Stop being such a child. I'm doing you both a favor by pointing out the obvious" Is he serious? 

"You haven't pointed out anything, because there is nothing to point out. We are acquaintances and we could possibly even be friends if you'd leave it alone" 

"I will NOT leave it alone, Sherlock. Because you know what happened the last time I left it alone?"

"WHAT? TELL ME, MYCROFT. WHAT HAPPENED?" I am shouting at him now, because he has no right to try and run my life. 

"You got your heart broken! That's what bloody happened and I won't let it happen again! I knew how you felt before you did, I could have and I should have helped you!" 

"There is nothing you could have done! You aren't me, you don't know every little aspect of my life. You may know about my feelings for John, but that is apparently a lot more obvious than I wish it was" 

"Sherlock, just listen, for God's sake. You feel for Andy, I know you do and deep down you do too. Andy feels for you too, he does, and being stubborn like you are, has yet to admit it to himself because he knows he is leaving tomorrow. For once in your life, listen to me and don't let this one fall by the waste side. He's good for you" No, you butting the fuck out of my life is what is good for me…..I really need to knock that cursing off. 

"Piss off, Mycroft. I don't need you sticking your nose into my life and I definitely am not going to talk about John with you. I'm leaving now" I'm entirely done with him and this conversation. So much so that his arse is going to get a break because I no longer have the energy to force the umbrella up it. 

"Think it over, Sherlock. Deal with your problem and think it over" He states calmly as I walk out the door. I do not want to think about what he just said to me, because part of me is worried that there is a chance, if only a little one, that it could be true.


	15. Familiarity

Andy

“The universe is rarely so lazy.” It’s definitely an interesting thing to consider. I checked the number in my phone one more time. It’ll be nice to have a friend here in London whenever we tour again. I smiled at the thought. I really only have friends from LA. I chuckled, though I’m pretty sure every fan of the band would tell me they were my friend. I realized I was on my sixth cigarette. I really should think about cutting back.

I bet the guys will want to do something tonight. I suppose I should wait around for that text. Hopefully, drinking isn’t involved. It’s been a long time since we’ve all hung out without large quantities of alcohol involved. Just us guys would be great.

My phone buzzed. It was a text from Ashley. Speak of the Devil. 

"Hey, I kno we’ve all been partying hard lately, figured we’d do smethng sober 2nite before we leave 2moro. We were wanting to go out for dinner. U can bring that friend of yours if ya want. We were kinda rude and stole you last night. ;)"

I supposed if Sherlock and I were going to be friends, that he should meet the band, in a less abrupt, obnoxious setting. 

"Sure thing Ash. I still need some quiet time today, but I’ll see you guys tonight."

It was less than a minute before I got a reply. 

"Np dude. Cya 2nite. Txt later with the place."

I smiled. I really do need to just act normal around Ash, it really isn’t like he turned me down to hurt me, he just doesn’t like guys. I smiled as I sent a text to Sherlock. 

"Hey, I know this is probably really weird to ask, but the band wants to get dinner tonight. They said you could come if you’d like. No alcohol involved; they wanted to apologize for interrupting us last night. Just let me know. :)" 

Did I really just send a smiley face? Wow. Weird. I stuffed my phone back in my pocket.

I figured I would actually walk for once. I feel like I would be pushing it if I tried to sleep again. “Now our lives have changed, I wish that I could heal. Time has taken love, a darker side revealed. For every lie begins, with what we used to feel.” I haven’t performed Walk Away in so long either. I suddenly found myself in a garden. I may not look it but I am a sap for flowers. “Blaming myself, tied to these chains, living in pain. All of your tears, everything's gone, is it too late? Walk away!” Orchids. Interesting. I found myself interrupted when I heard a woman shout my name in an excited manner. “Andy Biersack?!” I looked up.

The woman was with a man. Boyfriend or husband. She had short reddish blonde hair. He was slightly taller than her, blonde hair. 

“Sorry to just blurt that out.” She apologized. It seemed sincere enough. “I heard a song of yours on the radio in a cab a few weeks ago and fell in love with the music.”

I smiled. “I’m glad to hear that.” I reached my hand out to shake.

“I’m Mary. And this is my husband, John.” Those names sounded familiar, but they’re so common why wouldn’t they. John didn’t look amused with me. They both shook my hand. “You already know me.” I chuckled.

“Of course. I’m surprised you’re still in London.”

“We had a few days off before our next show in Bristol. We leave tomorrow night.”

“Well, be safe in your travels. We should be getting back home.”

“Thank you ma’am.” I smiled as they turned and continued on.

I’m not sure how much time had passed I had found my way back to wear I fell asleep on the bench, I still haven’t heard back from Sherlock. I can’t imagine he’d want to hang out with a bunch of rock buffoons, I laughed. My phone buzzed. My breathing hitched a minute, but it was only Ashley with the restaurant they’d picked. 

"Hawksmoor Seven Dials. 6pm. 11 Langley Str." 

It was four now. I had a couple hours to kill. I was close enough I could walk easily.

My phone buzzed. It was Sherlock. I held my breath. 

"I suppose it would be rather enjoyable. Which restaurant?" I was surprised. 

"Hawksmoor Seven Dials @6." I waited a couple minutes. 

"That’s rather expensive don’t you think?" That didn’t sound promising. 

"I’ll cover the bill for you no problem". Please, say yes. I don’t know why this seemed to matter so much. 

"See you at 6". I had the urge to cheer like a teenaged girl. Wow. I have a problem.

It wasn’t long I found myself in front of the restaurant. I was slightly early. Eventually, Ashley, CC, Jinxx, and Jake all came up in a cab.

“Your friend coming, Andy.” It was Ashley. I have a feeling Jake talked to him.

“Yeah, go ahead and grab a table.”

Sherlock spooked me by coming up from behind me. I laughed. “Good to see you again.”

“You as well.”

I held the door for him and spoke. “They’re not drinking, but I apologize ahead of time for any antics.” I smiled. It was meant lightheartedly. I led the way, for some reason I was nervous.


	16. Expect the Unexpected

Sherlock

I'm beginning to think my life's theme is turning into a 'Big Brother' slogan, expect the unexpected. I cringe inwardly at my use of American television slogans in reference to my life, but it's rather unfortunately fitting. 

To be a master of deduction, I have failed miserably on all accounts when it comes to Andy Biersack. I can't anticipate a single move he is going to make and this invitation to dinner with his band mates was certainly no exception. 

My stomach tightens just slightly as I round the corner to the restaurant and see Andy there waiting out front. That's a peculiar reaction, one I do not care at all to contemplate right now….or ever. 

Before I know what's happening Andy is ushering me into the restaurant. It's a lovely establishment and I find myself grateful for my daily clothing choices. I follow him through the maze of tables and patrons until we reach a table in the back of the restaurant, slightly secluded from the rest. 

"There you are! We were starting to wonder where you guys were". Andy glares daggers into him. He winks playfully and laughs, a laugh so contagious that soon the entire table is laughing, including Andy and (surprisingly) myself. 

"Sherlock, this ass hole right here is Christian Coma, everyone calls him CC" Andy introduces him with a chuckle.

"Sherlock Holmes, pleasure to meet you" I shake his hand and smile. 

"Hello! Are you going to bother introduces the rest of us?" I know who that is, that's Ashley, the center of Andy's turmoil.

"Calm your tits, Ash, I'm getting there. Sherlock, this is Ashley Purdy" He looked me in the eyes after the introduction, a silent plea for me to pretend that I have no idea who he is, or that I am aware of his significance. I answer back with a look that I hope communicates my agreement, I don't want to see him hurt anymore than he already is. 

Christ, could I be anymore sappy? Why do I even care? I don't care about these things, it has nothing to do with me and I would do good to remember that. I've got my own problems. Wait a minute….why are we communicating through eye contact? That's more than a bit not good, we shouldn't be able to do that, we've known each a whopping day and a half. Shit, he's introducing someone else, I will have to examine these issues later. 

"And this is Jake Pitts and Jeremy Ferguson, we call him Jinxx" He finishes introducing the band to me and I shake all their hands. They all seem like decently intelligent people, very similar to Andy, except transparent in their readability. Is it really just Andy that I can't read, just him out of a group that is so similar in taste and intellect? As everyone sets to looking at a menu and the conversation dies down for a moment, I decide to find out for sure. 

I look a the man everyone calls CC. Immediately I can see the words pop up, like white text all around his body. He's the jokester, the clown, he likes to make everyone laugh and he provides a much needed lightness to the group. He was born in California, judging by the accent, in his late twenties. He's played the drums since age 9, I can tell by looking at his hands. He's not currently seeing anyone, hasn't since his break up last year, and he's straight. They all are, in fact. Except Andy, of course. 

I look to Ashley next. He's exactly where he wants to be in his life, this is his dream, what he always wanted to do. He dreamed of California, Los Angeles, fame long before he was old enough to pursue it. He was born in Missouri, but he moved to California as soon as he could, which was age 18. He attended University there where he obtained a degree in Marketing. He's in his very early 30's, a womanizer, not likely to settle down, at least not anytime soon. He plays bass in the band. He also wants Andy to be happy, that's easily read by the way he looks at him. He doesn't judge him and he doesn't see him differently. He loves Andy, he's his best friend, but he can't be what Andy needs, he likes women. His sexuality doesn't matter to him though, he's not homophobic, he just wants him to find someone that makes him happy. Someone that can make him smile. 

I can read Ashley like a book and I find that I do not hate him like I thought that I would. He means no harm to Andy, he really does want the best for him. He wants him to find someone. I hope Andy knows this, I hope he can see that. It may not completely ease his pain, but I think it would help him begin to heal. Wow, I'm starting to sound like a bad romance novel, back to my deductions then. 

Jake and Jinxx, they are very close friends, that is easy to spot. Jake is married, I can tell by the wedding band on his finger, and he's the only one in the group that is, though Jinxx was married, but is divorced now. They are both from the midwest region of the United States as well, seems CC is the only one who isn't. Jake is from Idaho, mid twenties, and the lead guitarist in the band. Oh, it seems his mother just recently passed away, I would offer my condolences but that would probably be a bit not good, they might not be as open about what I do as Andy as been so far, though they do seem pretty similar to him. 

Jinxx, he is from….Iowa? Yeah, definitely Iowa. He has been playing the guitar for a long time, it seems he acquired his first one when he was very little, perhaps two or three. He also….well, well….plays the violin. I would know a violinist hands anywhere, being a player myself. That is most intriguing! 

All of them, every single one, I can see the white text. The words floating around their heads completely and utterly readable for anyone who had half a mind to look. I look at Andy and there is nothing, not a single white word pops up. There is nothing readable about him at a glance, I have to go very far into my head to be able to deduce anything about him, and as I am already very well aware, even that doesn't give me much to go. 

We order our food a few minutes later and the conversation picks back up again. Everyone is talking and I'm just listening, taking in the conversation, trying to gauge the personalities of all these different people and how they relate to Andy and how he relates to them. It's a lot of information that I will have to go to my mind palace to sort later, but it's valuable information.

Is it really though? I have always been adamant about only keeping information that pertains to the work. Andy doesn't have anything to do with the work, so why do I feel information about him is pertinent? And a better question, pertinent to what, exactly? I am once again brought from my thoughts as I notice someone speak to me. 

"What do you do, Sherlock?" Ashley asked me, he smiled kindly. He really did seem like a nice enough guy. 

"I'm a detective" I won't go into my whole spiel about being a consulting detective. I'm doing my best not to be too….well….me. I don't want to upset them with my…..off beat manner. Yeah, that's a good way of saying it. 

"He's a consulting detective, the only one in the world" Andy says and smiles. Really? Here I was trying to be modest. 

"What does that mean?" Jake chimed in, curious. 

"I take private clients as well as consulting with the police when they are….struggling with a case" More like when they are too stupid to observe what's right in front of them. 

"The police come to you?" CC has entered the conversation now. 

"Yes. If they need me, the contact me and I will go and have a look" I really did not expect to have to talk about this. 

"You must be good" Jinxx is the final person at the table to join in. 

"He is very good, he can read people just by looking at them" Andy chimes in and gives me a small wink. What was that about? Is he bragging on me? No, that is just an idiotic thought. I push it out of my head immediately, my brain is far better than to entertain thoughts like that. 

"I simply observe" 

"Show us. If you wouldn't mind, that is" Andy looked hopefully at me. God, if I only knew what he was thinking it would make my current state of living so much better. However, I don't want to disappoint and at the same time I refuse to deduce anyone at the table out loud. That could make for a bad evening if it were to go wrong, so I come up with a solution. 

"Pick someone, anyone, as long as they aren't at this table" Why do I feel like a magician all of a sudden? 

"How about that guy over in the corner, the one with the grey blonde hair, eating with the blonde woman in the purple dress" Ashley tilts his head in their direction. 

I turn my head to look and I freeze. I can easily deduce this man, and his woman for that matter, and it would have nothing to do with my incredible deductions skills. I know them, well. 

"A terrible coincidence, but it seems I actually know that couple. That wouldn't be a fair example" It comes off without a hitch and they all smile. They all look around for another suitable candidate for me to pick apart and while they are looking, Andy leans over and speaks quietly into my ear. 

"The universe is rarely so lazy. I saw that same couple earlier when I was walking. Who are they?" Seems he has really been listening to me. He's right to point that out, the universe is rarely so lazy. 

"They are John and Mary" 

"Yes, she introduced them. She's a fan of the band, he didn't seem overly amused" Go figure, John not overly amused by something, well that's a shocker. 

"He's never overly amused, he could use some lightening up" That much is true, he can be way to serious sometimes, I suppose that is the lingering soldier in him. 

"You seem to know him well, is he…..Oh My God" Seems the lightbulb has clicked on. 

"Yes, that's him" I say, answering his unspoken question. 

"I want to meet him, formally" Why do I get the feeling that he isn't taking kindly to John? 

"Perhaps after dinner, if we can catch them" That is not something I am keen to have happen. I can tell that he is about to say something else when Ashley speaks up again. 

"Alright, that guy right over there, the one sitting alone" I look and see two men sitting alone, their tables one in front of the other and I notice one of them is Mycroft. Oh for the love of all that is holy, what the actual hell is he doing here? 

"The one reading the paper or the one eating the cake?" I sincerely hope he doesn’t choose Mycroft, I really don't want to admit I know anymore people in here. 

"The one reading the paper, who reads a paper in a restaurant?" Ashley laughs. Thank whatever deity, if one exists, for saving me from having to explain Mycroft. 

"He is the CEO of a major manufacturing company, that much is obvious by the way he is sitting and what he's wearing. He has three children, I can tell because he has there pictures in his wallet, which he had open to check if his card was there when we came in earlier. He also has a wife, though she is soon to be his ex wife, he left her though, that is obvious by the lack of a wedding ring. He has recently taken it off, the tan line is far to fresh for it to have been off for long. If she had left him, he would still be wearing it with a small hope that she might come back, but no, he has rid himself of it quickly, he's the one that left. He is reading the paper because he is looking for a good attorney, he knows he doesn't have a chance at custody of the children otherwise. He has skeletons in his closet that he would rather not be exposed in court, the least of which is his offshore bank accounts in the United States, again the contents of his wallet tell us that. He has been laundering money for quite some time, it has paid for all his luxuries that he currently enjoys, including his cottage in Sussex Downs that he bought for his mistress, the mud on his shoes and the cottage key on his keys gives that away"

I finish the deduction and look from the man in question back to the people at the table. The people who are all staring at me in absolute disbelief, including Andy, who I am now remembering hasn't actually seen me deduce until just now. 

"That was wicked!" CC speaks up first, smiling incredulously.

"You've got to teach me how to do that, bro" Ashley chimes in next, he seems genuinely impressed. They all nod their heads at the comment. 

"Well done, Sherlock, I can see why the police need you" Andy smiled and his eyes were bright and shiny. I was pleased that the deduction was accepted so well by his band mates, but the real joy was that it was accepted by him. I guess I kind of consider him a friend at this point? It seems like we are friends. Seeing as I don't do the whole friend thing very well, it makes sense that I would be pleased at his acceptance. That's definitely what it is, nothing more. 

"What do you do for fun, Sherlock? Other than what you just did of course, I'm sure that's pretty fun" Jake spoke to me. 

"I suppose it can be rather interesting. Honestly, I don't get out all that much, but I do enjoy doing experiments, I'm a graduate chemist, actually. I also enjoy playing the violin" I look at Andy out of the corner of my eye who is watching me intently, listening to me talk. I realize those were two things I had yet to share with him. 

"You play the violin? So do I" Jinxx spoke up and I resisted the urge to say that I already knew. 

"Interesting! It's such a beautiful instrument, don't you think?" I could talk about the violin for hours. 

"It is, truly. I'm classically trained. Bach and Beethoven and all that" 

"I quite enjoy Bach myself, some challenging pieces, I'm always quite happy when I manage a perfect play through" 

"Aren't we all, it's a proud moment for anyone who can perfect a Bach play through"

"Indeed" I smile and he smiles back. I think I'm getting along with these people pretty well. For once I don't feel stunted for my lack of social skills, I think it could be, perhaps, because this group is just a lot more accepting that mosts people. They don't seem put off by my differences. 

It seems like the rest of dinner flies by and before I know it, we are all getting up to leave. I glance over for the first time since Ashley pointed him out, to see that John and Mary are getting up to leave too. Great. 

We all walk outside and everyone says their goodbyes, to my surprise, Andy stays with me, informing his band mates that he will catch up with them later. 

"I want to meet him, Sherlock" Andy looks at me seriously. Why does he care so much about meeting John anyway? 

"Well, here's your chance because he is walking out and is not likely to miss us" Like clockwork, John spots me. 

"Sherlock, what are you doing here?" I give him a look, one that he is far too used to, that says 'did you really just ask me that' without actually saying it. 

"John, I know your deduction skills aren't that appalling. Surely you can manage to deduce what I am doing at a restaurant" John smiles and shakes his head, he's used to my remarks. 

"I suppose you deemed it necessary to eat today, then?" Smart arse. 

"It would appear so, though I am not here alone" I gesture to Andy, who steps up beside me. 

"Andy Biersack" He sticks out his hand to shake John's before I can introduce him. 

"John Watson. My wife and I met you earlier in the garden. I didn't know you knew Sherlock" John was sizing him up. I knew it and it pissed me off. He didn't have any right to. He's not my bloody keeper. 

"I remember. I didn't know you were the John that used to live with Sherlock, or else I would have introduced myself properly, seeing as we both know him" Yeah, Andy definitely isn't taking John very well. 

"You told him about me?" John looked at me questioningly. I can talk about whatever I want with whom ever I want, he should remember that. 

"You are quite a big part of my life, at least you used to be, I can't hardly leave you out when discussing my life and my work. Andy and I shared a few stories, you happen to be in a few of them" I really didn't have to answer to John, but I felt like that was a good answer none the less. 

"I used to be? What is the matter, Sherlock? Have you replaced me or something?" He looked at Andy. 

"You would have no one to blame but yourself if he did" Andy glared back at John. 

"Seriously? Sherlock, tell me what is going on with you. Right. Fucking. Now" John was angry, I worried this would happen. Though I'm not quite sure why it's happening. Andy is right, John is the one that left, John has a life with Mary now. I'm allowed to take another friend, I need another person in my life. I can't just sit around wishing John wanted me like I wanted him. That's not who I am, I'm sodding Sherlock Holmes for God's sake! 

"I expect that my personal life is mine to do with what I wish. I don't have anything to tell you John, nothing except I have made a new friend and as someone who claims to be my best friend, you should be glad I have someone else to talk to. You aren't exactly present anymore" I know that comes out a bit more venomous than I originally intended. 

"Sherlock, come on. Don't be like that, please talk to me" I don't want to and I can feel my emotions beginning to rise. I can't break. Please, God, don't let me break. Not here. Not now. 

"Can't you see he doesn't want to?" Andy stepped up again. I'm stunned by how willingly he comes to my defense considering the short amount of time we've known each other. 

"He can speak for himself. Sherlock, talk to me, now!" 

"I have nothing to say, John. Not this time" I turn my head, I just can't look at him anymore. No one should see Sherlock Holmes like this, no one is meant to ever see me like this. I feel so weak and I hate it with every fiber of my being. 

"Sherl……" John starts to speak and Andy cuts him off. 

"Haven't you done enough?" He spits and before I can process when is happening, he takes me by the hand and leads me down the street. We don't stop until we reach Baker Street, where we halt abruptly at the front door. 

"You didn't have to do that" I look up at him and it's novel. I'm not used to looking up, I'm usually the taller one. 

"I know, I wanted to. I didn't like seeing you so hurt. It really……bothers me" He says and it's almost like a confession. 

"Why?" I don't understand why he gives a flying fig about me. He shouldn't. 

He thinks for a long second before replying, "I don't know"


	17. Walk Away

Andy

Sherlock look at his apartment door like he dreaded walking in it. It must be hard. They lived together for a long time. I did the only think I knew how to do. I took his hand in mine and started walking down the street with him. My heart was racing and I had no idea why. Seeing what John did to him, I know that feeling all too well. I felt the grip on his hand tighten just a bit. I gently rubbed my thumb on the back of his hand as we walked.

We ended up at a park next to Boating Lake. I found us a spot and sat down in the grass. He followed suit. Obviously, disgruntled.

“Why would you do that?” He asked me again.

“I really don’t know.” I looked him square in the eyes. Eyes that nearly rivaled mine in perfection. Did I just say perfection? “I just…. I really don’t want to see anyone in pain. Especially, pain I recognize.”

The stars were bright again tonight. It was something I was grateful for. He set his hand in the grass, I took this opportunity again, and I set mine gently on top of his. “Do you mind if I sing a song?”

He glanced up at me. “I don’t think I could ever decline a request from you to sing.”

It was Walk Away that I had in mind. I started singing it to myself earlier today, I feel like Sherlock needs to hear it right now. 

“Now our lives have changed, I wish that I could heal. Time has taken love, a darker side revealed. For every lie begins, with what we used to feel.” I decided to move myself closer so that our legs were touching. “Blaming myself, tied to these chains, living in pain. All of your tears, everything's gone, is it too late? Walk away!”

I felt like crying. I don’t know why. The only thing I felt right now was my racing heart, and the need to comfort my friend. Friend? Already. “A lonely heart remains until we know the truth. But if it stays the same, can we make it through? A life without the hurt, a life without you.” I saw a ferry in the distance. A boat ride could be nice. “Blaming myself, tied to these chains, living in pain. All of your tears, everything's gone, is it too late? Walk away! Everything's gone, everything's gone. Blaming myself, tied to these chains, living in pain” A boat ride it is then. Something quiet. We can watch the view. Minimal conversation required. I stood up, turned around and offered both my hands to him. “All of your tears, everything's gone, is it too late? Walk away! Walk away (everything's gone) Walk away (everything's gone) Walk away. A life without you, everything's gone. A life without you, everything's gone.”

His grip never lightened on my hand. He was afraid, of what I had no idea. I laughed to myself. What I wouldn’t give for his deduction skills right now. The longer his hand stayed in mine, the more I felt something nagging at me to not leave London. Regardless, that wasn’t an option. I loved performing. Not only that… it’s my job.

“Where are we going?” He sounded calmer now. For that I was thankful.

I gestured with a nod to the ferry on the lake. “Thought we could use something relaxing to pass the time.” I smiled lightly. I intertwined our fingers until we reached the ferry dock. I wasn’t sure how much this cost, and frankly I didn’t care. I just opened my wallet and handed the woman at the gate $100. She handed me the passes and we were off.

A nice classical piece was playing. I enjoyed classical, but I couldn’t tell you the first thing about the composers.

“Bach. It’s a Bach piece.”

I laughed. “I’m a pretty shitty musician. I can’t tell you one classical piece from another.”

“Doesn’t make you a poor musician. You’re very talented.” His smile was faint. I wanted to look at the stars. I managed to find a staircase that led to the upper level. Tables and chairs were out. It was a slow night so there weren’t any other people around to bother us.

He sat. “I’m going to find a bathroom. I’ll be back.” I hurried back downstairs and made my way to the bathroom. I pulled out my phone, I hadn’t realized I had a message. It was from Ash. 

"Hey man! Hope you’re doing ok. I like Sherlock. He’s a good guy. Keep him around. :*" I laughed. Ashley always uses such pointless emoticons on everything. 

"Thanks Ash. It’ll def. be nice to have a friend in London when we come back". I leaned against the sink counter. Buzz. 

"Are you sure he’s just a friend, Andy?" I paused. 

"What do you mean?" Did I really want to hear Ashley’s answer? 

"Andy, I saw the way you looked at him tonight. There’s something. A chemistry. Jake saw it too". I shut my phone and put it back in my pocket. Was there really something more going on?

When I returned I found Sherlock looking out at the water. Obviously, deep in thought. I pulled up a chair and sat next to him.

“We really can’t live without them you know.”

I looked at him. Confused for a moment, but then I realized where he was going.

“I can’t live without, John. And you cannot live without Ashley. As much as we wish they were something else, they never will be. And because we love them, we’ll stay their friend, as long as it means we can be close to them.”

I smiled. “It’s true. And without Ash, my band wouldn’t be here. All the guys. If any of them quit now, I don’t think I could replace them.”

He nodded in agreement.

“If there is one thing I’ve learned since travelling with them, it’s that you should never let people stop impressing you, no matter how long you’ve known them.”

The silence that ensued wasn’t uncomfortable or awkward. I got up to stand and look over the edge; I found it wasn’t long before Sherlock was by my side. It was companionable, it was nice. For once, I didn’t feel the need to explain myself or question anything around me.

“Thank you, Andy.”

“For what?” I turned to him as he looked off into the distance.

“For sticking up for me. You didn’t have to.”

I knew I didn’t have to give a response. We both knew it wasn’t necessary. The urge that overcame me next was overwhelming. I had to do it. Or something in me told me I’d regret it forever. I brought my left hand to his cheek, my right to his hand and lowered my head until my lips met his as soon as they did my whole body was filled with an electrical sensation.


	18. Heart and Mind

Sherlock

Even if I could have seen it coming, even if this had been the most predictable situation in world, I wouldn't have stopped it. As it stands, this is probably the most unpredictable situation I have ever been in, and if I am to be honest, I have never felt more alive. 

The minute he touched his lips to mine, everything else ceased to exist. The only thing that mattered was us, right here, right now, in this moment. For a long moment we just held still, both of us needing to process the fact that this was really happening.   
I moved my free hand, the one that wasn't holding his, to rest on his hip. He moved a fraction closer and leaned down further at the exact same time I tilted my chin up further. His lips were soft, but firm, he kissed like he meant it and I returned the sentiment. 

We both deepened the kiss together, moving our lips slowly against each other's as if we were made to do this. Perfectly in sync. It wasn't rushed or heated, there were no underlying expectations. It was just the two of us, sharing all of our pain, all of our hurt, all of longing with each other. It was the two of us telling each other everything we didn't feel like we could say out loud. It was 'I'm here for you' and 'thank you'. It was 'I'm really glad you’re here' and 'I don't want you to go'. 

When we broke the kiss, both of us breathing a bit heavier than either of us were problem willing to admit, I felt the loss instantly. I had kissed before, plenty of times, but it never felt like that. 

We put our foreheads together, his hand still resting on my cheek and mine on his hip, our fingers laced together on our other hands. We looked into each other's eyes, and in that moment, we both knew what the other was thinking. 

"I don't know what has come over me" Andy spoke first. "But, that was right. It felt right"

"It was and it did. In my mind, I can't rationalize what has come over me either. I can't rationalize how I can feel any kind of attachment to you in two days time. It's not logical, but never the less, it's there" Well, it seems I have just admitted what I have been adamantly denying since I met him. Seems I am attracted to him. 

"The heart doesn't always coincide with the mind. You're right, there is no logic here whatsoever. I shouldn't feel attached to you, but somehow I do. I've known you two days and I feel like I've known you my whole life" He spoke from the heart, it was genuine and it made me smile so big it threatened to split my face in two. He smiled back and pressed another kiss to my lips. 

We pulled apart, a bit reluctantly on both ends, and walked hand in hand to the railing of the ferry. He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and I slipped mine around his waist, my head settling into the crook of his neck as I did. I felt him lead his head to rest atop mine as we look out above the open water, into a twinkling night sky. 

I could have stayed like that for hours, for days even, but the ferry eventually came to a halt. Andy took my hand and I threaded my fingers through his as we walked hand in hand back to my flat, back to Baker Street. 

When we got there, we stood at the door, neither of us willing to part ways and both of us knowing that it was inevitable. 

"It doesn't have to be tonight" Andy says as I fish my key out of my pocket. 

"No, it doesn't" I slip the key into the door and it clicks open. We both walk inside and up the stairs, neither of us saying a word, but both of us knowing exactly what the other one wants. 

We take off our coats and make our way to the sofa, he sits down and reaches out to me. I take the hint and curl up into his side, my head on his chest, his fingers running smoothly through my hair. If time was measured by comfort, we should have been doing this for ages. Neither of us needed to talk, we just needed to be near each other. 

"I want to stay" I knew both what he was asking and what he was wishing. 

"I want you to stay" He leaned down and kissed my head. He knew I was giving permission and sharing his wish at the same time. 

We stayed like that a bit longer, until I could no longer go without using the restroom and had to get up. I leaned down and kissed him softly before getting up to use the loo. 

"Sherlock?" He called from the sitting room.

"Hm?" 

"Can I borrow some pajamas?" My heart skipped a beat at the request and I smiled. 

"Of course, I'll get you some" I went to my bedroom and undressed, putting on my own pajamas, before carefully choosing some for Andy and heading back to the sitting room. 

"Thank you" He smiled and stood up to go put them on. 

When he returned, barefoot and shirtless in nothing but my pajama pants, I nearly dropped dead of a heart attack. He tilted his head slightly and grinned at me. 

"Like what you see?" He teased and I smiled, feeling the flush creep over my cheeks. 

"You are very nice to look at" I admitted. When did I become so bloody shy? 

"You're not so bad yourself" He looked my square in the eye and I knew that he meant it. 

"Lets watch a film, huh?" Normally I'm not much on idle television watching, but with Andy, it just sounded nice. 

"The Exorcist" Andy raised his eyebrows. "That's some scary shit" 

"Horror film. Good excuse to sit close to you. I'm amendable to the suggestion" 

"That is the point of horror films!" He smiled. 

We found it on Netflix and turned it on. It wasn't long before we were pressed tightly together on the couch, my face buried in his bare chest and his eyes peaking over the top of my hair. It was the scariest film I'd ever seen, but I was happy to be close to Andy. 

When it was over we decided to turn on something a little less frightening and decided on 'Love Actually'. We stayed curled up together and began watching the film. I couldn't say exactly when, but at some point, we fell asleep.


	19. I Can't Stop This

Although, I’m up early I actually slept decently, I looked down at the man in my arms, still sound asleep. I suddenly don’t want to finish the tour anymore. I’d rather stay here and enjoy the company of Sherlock for the next 7 months. It was May. Our tour wouldn't finished up until mid-December.

I pulled my phone off from the back of the couch. 6am. I need to be back at the hotel and ready to leave by 1:30. Bristol was a little less than two hours away. We had to be there in time for makeup and sound check before the meet and greet. It will be the longest two hour bus ride of my life, I guarantee it.

I kissed Sherlock’s forehead. What is it about this man that has me so… giddy? That has me so fucking confused. I don’t mind it. It’s just so overwhelming. Something I’ve never had, not even with Ash. He makes everything better. I realize I haven’t had a cigarette since yesterday afternoon, and it doesn’t bother me that much.

“Good morning.”

I heard Sherlock grumble. Obviously, he slept well.

He raised his head and kissed my chin. “How did you sleep?” I smiled.

“Better than I have in ages. I’m used to being up all night working on cases. How about yourself?”

“I would agree with your statement, except I don’t sleep because I suffer from insomnia.

After a few minutes Sherlock got up and made tea; I have to say after having legitimate English tea made by him, it will never taste good anywhere else again. We sat next to each other in silence. Neither of us wanted to face what today brought.

“The shower is down the hall, just there.” He pointed. “Feel free to utilize whatever clothes you see fit. We can’t have you leaving in the same thing you had yesterday.”

After a few moments I took him up on his offer. I needed to clear my head, just as soon as I’m happy; I have to have it taken away. Was this what Jake meant when he said missing someone isn’t easy. I haven’t even left yet. What would leaving actually be like? Even though it was just hours away, it wasn’t something I wanted to think about. I didn’t need any particular clothes for the bus, so I just settled on a white button up shirt and a pair of jeans. I slipped my boots and accessories on so I wouldn’t forget them.

“Nice shirt.” Sherlock chuckled.

“Thanks, I bought it out of this guy’s closet just now.” I laughed. My phone buzzed.

Andy where are you dude? We gotta get the bus loaded and ready to go?

Sorry to worry you. I’m fine. Don’t worry. I’ll be ready by 130.

“Ashley?”

“Yeah. They must have went to my hotel room and realized I wasn’t there. He was telling me we need to get the bus loaded.”

He looked down to the floor. He wanted me to stay as much as I wanted to. There was absolutely nothing I could do to fix this for him. As much as I wanted it. The tour had to go on. I ran my fingers through his hair. All of this felt so normal. “Go get dressed yourself so you can see me off at least.” I smiled.

***

We walked hand in hand back to hotel and the bus. Neither of us saying much, but that seemed just apart of us being together. Frankly, it was nice to not have to fill the silence with awkward, unnecessary conversation. I wanted to spend every day like this.

I saw the crew loading up the equipment and a couple personal suitcases onto the bus. I know Ashley saw Sherlock and me as he was loading his bass, but he just opted to not say anything. Somehow, I knew he was happy for me. He is my best friend after all.

My hotel room was pretty trashed considering I hadn’t been in it long. It was as if my suitcase exploded in the room. Sherlock sat on the bed, while I tossed my belongings into my bag. “I can change back into my own clothes now.”

“Don’t fret over it. Keep them.”

“Are you sure?”

“Of course, just remember to return them next time you’re in London.”

I laughed and then got an idea. I dug through my accessory bag and pulled out one of my batman necklaces. “I know you’re probably not much of an accessories guy, but if I get your clothes, you should get something too.” I handed it to him.

He just looked into my eyes. I nearly cried. Why of all the things in my life, did this have to have shitty ass timing? “Thank you, Andy.”

I stood up between his legs as he sat on the bed and looked down. I put both hands on his face and kissed him once again. The electrical feeling was back, stronger than ever. If the song Heart of Fire was ever true, it was in this moment. I could feel this tough exteriored detective melt into my touch as he put both hands on my hips. I’m not religious, but I started praying to whatever was out there, that this wouldn’t be the last time I’d see him.

Had we not had the need to breathe, the kiss probably would have continued for quite some time.

“I’m sorry everything had to happen with such shitty timing.” I grabbed my suitcase.

“As I’ve said, the universe is very rarely lazy.” He smiled and followed me out of the room to the bus. The rest of the band was out smoking final cigarettes and enjoying the last few minutes of our time off. When they saw Sherlock and I, they headed inside. Apparently, they just had a hunch; or just making assumptions. Jake grabbed my suitcase, before he himself went inside.

“I wish I could do something to stop this, but I can’t.”

“It’s your job, Andy. You love it. Just as I love my work.”

“There are some things…” I paused a moment. I needed to pick the appropriate words without going too far. “There are some things in my life that I’d rather have in my life now than touring. A companion like you is one of them.” There that didn’t sound too sappy.

He looked as if he didn’t know what to say. I heard CC shout my name to hurry up. I held Sherlock’s right hand in mine, brought it to my lips and gently placed a kiss on it. “I’ll be back.” I turned and walked on the bus shutting the door behind me. As I heard it lock, it was as if my heart was being ripped in two.


	20. Possibilities

I feel like I'm drowning, all the air ripped from my lungs, my heart beating slower and slower until it stops completely. I can't breath, my chest hurts, my body aches, what is the matter with me? Panic attack, I'm having a panic attack. 

I sit down on a nearby bench as the bus pulls away, with Andy on it, and I try to breath. In through the nose, out through the mouth, in and out, and again. Alright, I'm going to be ok. Except, I'm not and I don't understand why. 

I shouldn't be attached to him so quickly, but everything about him feels right. His lips on mine, well, I've never felt anything like it. Kissing him made me feel alive in ways I didn't believe possible. Being with him makes me forget all my problems, all the issues that I've been facing, but at the same time, he doesn't distract me from the work. 

He just fits. He fits into my life in a way that no one, not even John, ever has. He understands, because what he does demands a lot of his time too. He accepts who I am and what I do, he isn't asking me to change. Unlike everyone else, he doesn't expect me to be someone that I'm not. 

It's a novel feeling, though I suppose most feelings are novel to me, but at the same time it feels like it's always been there. It's got the comfort of something that has been with you for a long while, and the novelty of something you've never experienced all at the same time. It's right, he's right, and he's gone. 

I continue to sit on the bench outside the hotel, my breathing finally returning to normal, but I still ache all over. Is this what it feels like to miss someone? If it is, I hate it. I don't want to have to miss him, I don't want to be away from him, and I am so disturbed by the depth of this that I'm not sure I'm going to be able to move. 

I want to go back to the flat and sleep, just sleep for days and weeks and months and when I wake up I want him to be there. And that is the stupidest thought that has ever entered my head, and probably among the time most illogical. But, knowing that, for some reason, doesn't keep me from wanting to attempt it. 

Knowing that these feelings are illogical, knowing that they are too soon, having all this knowledge, doesn't stop the feelings. I have been able to bury feelings for years and I hate it that I am unable to do it now. I don't really want to examine the reasoning behind my inability to shove aside, or even delete, these feelings. I just now that I'm simply not capable of it, Andy has gotten a hold of me in a way that I'm unsure if I'll ever be able to come out of. 

My legs begin to work and I am able to stand up, good, now I can go back to the flat. I begin to walk, lost in my own thoughts, thoughts of Andy, and I don't realize where I've gone until I'm standing at the door. I'm at John and Mary's and it suddenly dawns on me why my subconscious led me here. It's time to tell John, it's time to tell John everything. It's time to heal from the past and look to the future, John is my best friend and Andy, well, I'm not ready to delve into those just yet. 

I knock on the door and take a deep breath, I do not want to have a panic attack in front of John. The first one alone was embarrassing enough, I'm Sherlock Holmes for Christ's sake. 

"Sherlock?" John answers the door and, not surprisingly, he looks confused to see me. 

"John. We need to talk" 

"It's about time, come in, Mary's out" 

I walk into his flat, take my coat off and sit down on the sofa while he busies himself in the kitchen making tea. I don't want to have this conversation with John, I don't want to tell him everything, but I know that if I want to move on from this, I have to. If not for me, than for Andy, who has accepted me for who I am, which is already bad enough without adding extra John drama in there. 

"I have things I need to tell you. I will make it quick and if you deem in necessary to terminate our friendship, then by all means do so, I will understand. All I ask, is that you let me finish completely"

"Sherlock, I'm your best friend. I promise I'll let you finish, just please tell me what's going on with you" 

"John, after I jumped off the roof at St. Bart's I realized some things that I hadn't been aware of before. One of those things had to do with you. I realized that I cared about you a great deal more than I had originally believed. I knew I cared about you on some level, of course, enough that Moriarty thought to use it against me. We see how well that worked out for him. Anyway, I realized I loved you, in a way that I knew, deep down, you would never be able to return. I was going to tell you, to come clean, when I returned, but you were already engaged to Mary, I just couldn't do that. I adore you both and you must know that. I would never do anything to come between the two of you" I decide to stop for a moment, the initial confession is over, it's out there and I can't take it back. 

"Sherlock, I wish you would have told me. I can't tell you how things would have been if I would have known this from the beginning. I can't tell you if we would have been together, because honestly, I'm not gay, but you have always been the exception to everything. But, neither of us can change the past. I love Mary and you are my best friend. I will never judge you because you're gay Sherlock, and I'm not mad about your feelings. I can't return them at this point, but something tells me you wouldn't want me to, not any more" John smiled warmly. 

I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding, John didn't care. He wasn't bothered and he wasn't angry. More over, he seems to be picking up on whatever these feelings are for Andy that I seem to be having.

"What do you mean?" I feign misunderstanding. I want to know what he knows, or at least what he thinks he knows. 

"You know bloody well what I mean, Sherlock. Andy, the singer Mary is obsessed with. You two were together the other night"

"I…." he interrupts me

"No, don't you even sit there are try to deny it. I saw something there Sherlock, I'm not an idiot. There is more between the two of you than your letting on" 

"I've only known him a couple of days" Rational, yes, be rational. 

"Sherlock, I didn't even know you 24 hours before I moved in with you, went to a crime scene with you, and shot someone to save your life. Attachments form fast and you can't control how you feel. Not even you are that good, Sherlock" John laughed a little and I smiled. 

"I used to be able to control it" 

"Well you just hadn't found someone worth losing control for" 

"No one is worth losing control for…." Even as I say it, I don't believe it

"You and I both know that's not true" 

"I'm not good at feelings and sentiment, John. I don't understand. I've only known Andy for two days and it feels like a life time. He had to leave, to finish his tour today, I had a panic attack watching him drive away, John. A panic attack. Me" John looked at me in slight surprise before another smile crept onto his face. 

"What are you smiling about?" 

"Sherlock, how do you feel when you are with Andy?" Well, I guess now is as good a time as ever to be honest, it seems to be working so far. 

"I feel like nothing else matters. Like my heart is going to beat out of my chest. Kissing him, spending time with him, it feels right. It's comfortable, exciting, and scary all at the same time"

"Sherlock, mate, you love him" I choke on my tea. 

"Are you trying to kill me?" I'm still coughing over the offending sip of tea

"Sherlock, you are a master of deduction. Surely you can deduce this about yourself" 

"It's illogical and distracting. There is no way I can feel that strongly for someone in this short period of time. It's logical and knowledge"

"No Sherlock, not this time. This is feelings and heart, and the heart and the mind don't always coincide. You need to face this, Sherlock. Because despite my bad attitude the last time I saw you, I think he's good for you. I've spoken to Mycroft….don't give me that look…..he thinks he's good for you too" I smile and roll my eyes. The smile is for John and the eye roll, clearly, is for Mycroft. 

"Well, I'm glad you approve. Mycroft on the other hand, I couldn't care less. Did he call you?" 

"No, he text me the other day, I was at hospital doing rounds so I couldn't take a call" 

"Well, that's surprising"

"What is?" John looked at me confused

"That Mycroft texted you" I smirk, just a little, I can't help it. 

"Why is that? It's not like it's the first time he's texted me" 

"I'm just surprised he can text" 

"He's not stupid, Sherlock. Quite the opposite, actually. You know that" 

"Of course he's not stupid. I'm just surprised he can accomplish texting with cake in both hands. I will have to ask him how he manages to juggle it" I laugh to myself. 

"Sherlock, that's so rude" Andy would have laughed. 

"I don't care. I came for what I needed to John, you know everything now, so I am going to be going now" I am ready to get out of here. John is still my best friend, but I need some time alone to think now. 

"You love him, Sherlock. Please, don't deny yourself an opportunity to be happy" John called after me as I walked out the door. 

"I appreciate your concern John, but logic has to win somewhere. It's what I do. Love is just not possible yet" I wave a final goodbye and continue down the street in the direction of Baker Street. 

There is no way that love is possible yet. Is there?


	21. Surprise

We texted every day, even if it was just a few words. We both knew the other was busy, but we also had to see words between us, to know the other was still waiting. I began to rekindle my relationship with Ashley. It wasn’t fair to him to ignore him because of something I couldn’t control. I’d always love him, he was my best friend, and he wanted to see me happy.

We were back in the US now. Just another sign that Sherlock and I would be together soon. It was July now, two less months stood in my way. I had started writing a song, it had been a while since I had the inspiration for new material, Sherlock had given me that. It was a short piece, but it told a whole lot about us.

I had the lyrics written and I practiced them behind closed doors. The guys wrote the instrumentals to my humming of the lyrics. I didn’t want anyone to hear them and the song wouldn’t be performed until December 15, our last show in Los Angeles.

“Andy, what are you up to?” Ash plopped down on the couch.

“Just getting ready to send something to Sherlock.”

“You miss him?”

I looked to Ash with bright eyes. “You have no idea. It doesn’t make any sense, after only two days, but I do.”

Ashley smiled and Jake came in. “I told you, missing someone isn’t always fun, Andy.”

Jake whispered something to Ashley and I heard them go to the bunk room; I took the chance to write my letter.

“Dear Sherlock, After two days and just text messages, it doesn’t make sense that I miss you as much as I do, but here we are. I hope you are doing well, and keeping busy with work. I also hope Anderson hasn’t been too much of an oaf. Anyway, I have a surprise for you. I’m sure you can figure out what it’s for. I’ll text with the details closer to the day. Yours, Andy.”

In the letter I put a ticket to our Los Angeles concert and a first class plane ticket from London to LA. If I was going to confess my heart and soul. It was going to be done right, and in the only way I know to do something. Music. Lucky for me, it was a day off. As soon as I was finished, I ran to the nearest post box and dropped it in.

Five months left. I sent a text. “Hey you’ll be getting a surprise in the mail in a week or so. –Batman.”

I guess the nickname came about from my obsession with Batman that was apparent in our only two days together, but also the text messages we’d sent over the past couple months. This tour couldn’t end soon enough.


	22. Times can fly...but it doesn't always

Two months had passed and I would like to say that they passed quickly, but they really didn't. I enjoyed talking with Andy. We have been talking everyday, even if it's only a couple text messages. I find that I am living for the next time I hear from him…..this is getting out of control. 

The things is, I actually don't mind. I'm not one to relinquish control and I don't ever relish in the fact that I don't have it, but this is different. Andy is different. I can't control how I feel about him and for the first time in my entire life, that is absolutely alright. 

I trust him and I can only hope that he trust me. I hear the mail man come, so I decide I might as well check it. I hardly ever get mail, most people contact me via my website, or John's website, so I'm surprised when I see a letter in my mailbox. I'm over the moon when I deduce who it's from. It's from Andy. 

I open it and read it and I can't stop smiling. I miss him so much it's suffocating, and it seems he missed me too. Something else falls out of the envelope and I pick it up. Oh. My. God. 

Andy has sent me a plane ticket and a ticket to their last concert in Los Angeles. I just stand and stare at it for a moment, unable to process the amount of information that is currently storming its way through my mind palace. 

I'm still staring at the tickets when my mind finally processes and the information is carefully tucked into my mind palace in a special room labeled 'Andy'. He really does want to see me again, he really does want to be with me. After what I've dealt with, and knowing who I am, it hasn't been easy for me to believe that he wanted me like I want him. He does. I'm going to text him. 

I received your letter -SH

Did you like it? -A

I'm over the moon. Thank you, for the tickets. -SH

Your welcome. I can't wait to see you. -A

It is illogical in every way, but I miss you -SH

I miss you too. How's work? -A

Dull. I haven't had a good case in a couple of weeks -SH

Has Anderson been tolerable? -A

Of course not. He's absolutely insufferable, as usual -SH

Haha. I'd give anything to be with you right now. To laugh at Anderson with you -A

I'd throw away my severed head if I thought it would bring you to me -SH

What would you do if I was there? -A

I'd kiss you -SH

I like where this is going. I'd kiss you back -A

I'd kiss your mouth, down your throat, and suck a mark on your collar bone before kissing up your neck to your ear, where I'd whisper into it just how much I missed you -SH

Wow, Sherlock. I'd let you, I'd close my eyes and put my head back to give you better access. Your voice in my ear would make me shutter all over, it makes me shutter now just thinking about it -A

After that, I'd kiss you again on the mouth, hard. I'd cup your gorgeous face in my hands and walk you backwards until we were up against the wall -SH

I'd kiss you back, run my fingers through your curls and down your back until they made their way to the front of your fitted shirt -A

I'd slide my hands under your shirt and feel you skin. I want to feel you, badly -SH

I want to feel you too! I'd unbutton your shirt, touch your chest, all the while never breaking our kiss -A 

I'd pull your shirt off over your head -SH

I'd let yours slip from your shoulders -A

My hands would move to your belt buckle -SH

Mine would reach down the back of your trousers and cup your perfect ass -A

I'd slowly undo it, I'd take my time -SH 

I'd run my hands back up and down your body, then I'd unfasten your trousers and slowly undo the zip -A

You'd feel amazing, you'd be so ready for me -SH

I'd let your trousers fall to the ground. You'd be ready for me too -A

I'm ready for you - SH

God, I've never been so fucking ready for anyone in my life -A

It is right then that I hear footsteps coming up to my flat. It's Lestrade. Damn it all to hell!! He would pick now to decide he needs my help on a case! I haven't seen him in two weeks! 

I look down and notice there is a noticeable bulge in my trousers now. Well it's this just perfect. I breath slowly in and out. Dead bodies. Think about dead bodies. 

I look down again, Christ it's not working. Think about something else, anything else. Mycroft! Think about Mycroft! 

I look down one more time. Yeah, that worked. 

"Sherlock, there's been a murder" Lestrade bursts into my flat

"You could knock, you know" I roll my eyes. I'm not at all interested in this case right now. I want to talk to Andy. 

"There's no time Sherlock, we need you now" He sounds desperate. 

"Fine, I'll be right behind you. Now get out" 

"Thank you" He turns and leaves. 

Here comes Lestrade to ruin the day. I have a case, I'll text you later -SH

I understand, Sherlock. Go do your work, I've got a show too. We'll talk later. Miss you. -A

I look forward to it. Miss you too. -SH

I smiled and put on my coat. Time couldn't go quick enough.. 

The case Lestrade asked me to help with turned out to be a good one and it took me a month to figure out who the killer was and it took Lestrade another month to catch him. I text Andy everyday, we tried to pick up where we left on in our conversation that day, but it seemed like both of us were always getting interrupted. 

I'm grateful he understands the work, that is just one of the things that makes him special. I appreciate everything about him, he isn't dull like most of humanity, I actually enjoy rather than just tolerate him. I more than enjoy him actually, but I'm still not quite ready to admit that. 

Before I know what happened, three months have gone by since he sent me the tickets. I find myself marking the days off on my calendar….in the mind palace of course, I don't actually have time for a paper calendar. 

I smile and look at the tickets that are hanging on the fridge. Two months left. Time please move quickly.


	23. We Love You Too

Each performance meant one more closer to Sherlock. I had tweeted a few times about the “Special Los Angeles” performance. Countless followers asked why. I never answered, but I really wanted to shout it to the world. I wanted to tell them, I was falling in love. It’s crazy, but I am.

I was spending most of my down time working on the song I wrote or working on the last piece to the LA surprise. I felt like I was planning a proposal. Lord, help me if I ever wanted to. I don’t know what could top this.

“Sherlock, I miss you. –A”

“Thank God! A reason to stop talking to Mycroft. –SH”

“What’s he up to now. It’s been a while. –A”

“Just being a nosy git, as usual. –SH”

“Big brothers for you. –A”

“You have no idea. – SH”

“I miss you too. –SH”

“Just five weeks left. –A”

“I’m over the moon about this, Andy. –SH”

“I know. :) -A”

“Unfortunately, I have to go. I promised, John we would meet up for coffee. –SH”

“Have a good time. –A”

I’m glad he’s reconciling with John. I’d been a lot happier since making things normal with Ashley again. I had the two most important people in the world to me. That’s what was going to make LA so great. I’d have Sherlock, Ashley, and a crowd full of fans that loved me.

I opened the window to the bus bunk. A day off on the tour bus. They were always long, and when the one thing you’re waiting for is still a ways off. It sucks.

“Hey, Andy.” Ash laid down in the bunk across from me.

“Hey. What’s up?”

“Bored as hell man. We just got done working on the instrumentals for, Done for You.”

“Are they going well?”

“I know you’ll love it, Andy. Trust me. We’re trying our best to make this great for you guys. You deserve it.”

I smiled. I really did have the greatest friends.

“Are you sure you don’t want to do some practice run throughs?”

“Yeah. I really want to give it all. I want to feel everything at once for this, Ash.”

“I’m glad to see you happy, man. All of us are. For a long time, we knew something was going on. We were all worried about you. You smiled with Juliet, Andy; but you never looked like this.”

“Like what?”

“Andy, when you smile now, you really smile. When you perform, you’re giving everything you have. Not that you weren’t before, but there is more passion in it. It’s like you’ve been brought to life, man.”

“I feel alive, Ash.”

Ashley smiled. This smile was content. It was like he knew I was going to be okay. “The guys and I chipped in and got you something.” He handed me an envelope and left the room. I opened it.

Two tickets to London, scheduled to depart the day after the concert. They had a letter too, I guess they were imitating what I did for Sherlock, the loved me too.

Andy, These are for you and Sherlock. We’re glad to see you happy finally and we want to keep it that way. We’re sure you’ll use these in some romantic gesture, but we wanted to help out. Have fun. :* Ash, CC, Jake, & Jinxx.

I knew exactly how I’d present these to Sherlock. These last five weeks couldn’t pass quickly enough. All I wanted was to hold him in my arms.


	24. Smiles are contagious

Five week, that's all that stands between Andy and myself, five dull weeks. That is five weeks of boring cases with Lestrade, five weeks of getting ill at the site of Anderson, five weeks of pure torture. 

The only thing that is keeping me sane is the texts I get from Andy and the fact that John and I are starting to get back to the friendship that we had before everything went haywire. He's my best friend, and I'll always love him because of that, but I have discovered that my romantic love, my 'in love' love, does not belong to John anymore. 

I won't say it out loud, not even to John who simply grins and winks at me when I talk about Andy. He knows but he doesn't push, he's just being a good friend. I know when I'm going to say it, and it won't be until I see Andy in Los Angeles. I will tell him how I feel there and hope that the leap of faith doesn’t land me flat on my face. 

Mycroft knows too, not that I made any effort to inform the nosy bastard, but surprisingly he hasn't pushed for confessions either. Knowing Mycroft he already knows what my plan is, so he figures he doesn't have to interfere at the moment. Not that he won't find something to stick his cake sniffer into in due time. Git. 

"Sherlock, are you ready to go?" I'm pulled from my thoughts of the time left to go when John walks into my flat. We are going to lunch today at Angelo's. This should be interesting. 

"Yeah, just coming" I stand up and put on my coat and scarf. I feel my phone buzz as I walk down the stairs. 

Thinking of you, only five more weeks -A

Miss you more than I can express. These next fives weeks can't come soon enough -SH

If ever there was a time for the expression 'time flies' to be accurate, its now -A 

I couldn't agree more, though in five weeks it won't be time that's flying. It will be me -SH

I'm ready for you to be here, time needs to fly so you can -A 

I am ready too. Lestrade's cases are boring and Mycroft has been too quiet -SH 

I wouldn't worry too much about Mycroft, it's hard to talk with cake in your mouth -A

I almost spit my wine on John just now -SH

Did I make you laugh? ;) -A 

You have a natural talent for it, it seems -SH

Good to know I have a talent for something -A

You have more talent than any person I know -SH

See, now I really miss you -A

I know. I really miss you too. John is going to take my phone soon if I don't eat. Talk later -SH

Don't starve yourself. I need you alive in five weeks. Eat. We will absolutely talk later -A 

I read his text and smile before putting my phone in my pocket and digging into my food. I have been eating much more lately. Andy and John both tell me I need to eat, which is incredibly dull, but I do it for them. 

John smiles knowingly at me as I finish my food and I can't help but smile in return.

"Sherlock, I don't think I've ever seen you so happy. It's amazing. You've smiled more in the past couple months than you have in the five years I've known you", John said, a huge grin cemented to his face. 

I go for a nonchalant nod of my head, which would have worked if it wasn't for the huge grin threatening to split my face in two. 

"See, the great Sherlock Holmes is grinning like a school boy. I know it's Andy that makes you like this, Sherlock. I also know what it means when another person makes you this way", John put his hand on my hand and continued smiling. 

"John…", I started, because I know what he is getting at, and I won't say it. I don't want the first time I say it to be to anyone but Andy. 

"No, don't talk, listen to me", John interrupts what I'm about to say, "Just because I know what this is, just because I understand what this means, doesn't mean I'm going to push you into a discussion. I know that you are aware of all these things as well, if I thought you weren't, I would insist upon a discussion, but you are Sherlock Holmes and I know better than to think you haven't figured this out by now. All I want to say is that I am here for you. You are my best friend and I support you, I support Andy, and I support this. I won't put a label on it and I won't push you to put a label on it. Just know that you two have my full support, always". 

I can feel tears welling up in my eyes, but I will them away. I may have become a bit softer these days, but Sherlock Holmes does not cry, especially in public. 

"Thank you, John. That means more than I can express", I say as we put on our coats, our lunch together coming to an end. 

"It was nice to come back here, felt like old times. Now, you get back to the flat and call Andy, I can tell you want to talk to him", John says as I open the door so he can leave. 

"It's good to know you learned something during your time with me. You're deductions skills are far better than they used to be. I have to say, I'm proud", I smile at him. 

"That's high praise coming from you, Sherlock. I feel honored. I'll see you soon", he smiled and gives me a wave before hailing a cab to take him home. 

I turn and walk back to the flat, taking my phone out of my pocket and dialing it as I walk. John was right, I want to talk to Andy. 

********

Before I know it, five weeks has passed and I'm at the London Heathrow Airport waiting to board a plane that will take me to Los Angeles. A plane that will take me to Andy. 

I am excited and nervous at the same time, it seems like we have been waiting for this moment forever. I'm so excited to see the band perform again. I'm so excited to see my Andy. 

"Fllight 249 is now boarding", I hear a woman's voice call. That’s my flight. I pick up my things and board the plane, taking my seat that is (thankfully) by the window. I watch out the window and listen as the captain talks on the overhead speakers. 

Before I know it, we are taking off. I continue to look out the window as the plane takes off, watching London grow smaller and smaller the higher we fly. 

I will be in Los Angeles tomorrow, I will be seeing Andy tomorrow. I lean my seat back and think about just how much I'm ready to Andy, and suddenly I know exactly what I'm going to say when I see him. 

The last thing I remember is hearing the captain come over the speakers again to announce that we have reached our proper altitude and that it looks like we are going to have a smooth flight. After that, I must have actually dozed off, because the next time I open my eyes, I'm looking at a screen in front of my seat. A screen that said Welcome to London Heathrow when I fell asleep, a screen that now says Welcome to Los Angeles LAX. 

I'm here.


	25. Confession

I’m nervous, excited, and anxious all simultaneously. I have everything planned out. I don’t think I’ve ever been so nervous to perform a song. I was the only one who knew the lyrics. This would be the first time ever playing the song all together with words. I’m excited to finally see Sherlock after months of being apart. It’s crazy, but even though we only had two days together, it felt like it was a lifetime. I’m anxious to finish this show up as well. I have several surprises in store tonight. For Sherlock, the band, and the fans.

Our tour manager came in. “You ready for this, Andy.” I smiled. “I hope so, still a couple hours. Don’t make me more nervous than I already am.” He laughed back and gave me a hug. He knew tonight meant a lot.

“Has his plane landed yet?” I really just wanted to be with him right now.

“I sent a car to LAX, it should be arriving at any point now.

This was it.

I set everything up in my dressing room before heading on stage and performing a great first section. Now, onto the special event.

“Ladies and gentleman, tonight’s show is special for so many reasons. The first, is because we’re playing in Los Angeles, with all you cool mother fuckers.” I smiled and the crowd cheered. I knew with them supporting me I couldn’t fail. “The second reason is that there is someone very dear to me in the audience tonight.” I looked Sherlock in the eyes. It was like seeing the other half of your soul. It was the first moment I’d seen him since I left seven months ago. “And I’d like to ask him to come up on stage with me.” He looked surprised but came up hurriedly. I knew he just wanted to be near me. “I met this wonderful guy in London about six months ago.” I didn’t have to go into any other details for my fans, they understood. I knew Sherlock would appreciate the anonymity and short story. Our personal affairs didn’t need to be everywhere. “The final reason is a surprise not only for you guys.” I pointed to the audience. “But for him as well.” I looked at Sherlock. 

On that note, the stage crew brought a chair for Sherlock center stage. It was placed so that I could sing to him and the audience would get a profile view for both of us. The lights dropped completely in the audience and around the rest of the band. A dim light on us was the only thing allowing us to see. That’s what I wanted, despite the thousands of other people in the room; I wanted it to just be us. The music began:

“The best things in life come with a price. The star that burned so bright faded the fastest.” This song was going to tell multiple stories for us. We were the best thing for each other. The most import thing, but sometimes we have to be apart and the timing is all wrong. “You’ll always feel its right. Even when we end the fights.” No matter what we face together or with the others we love so much. It’s them, so in the end it’s okay. “Welcome home, home tonight.” Welcome home. We’re together, so we’re home.  
I looked more into his eyes now and stood in front of him, and raised his chin to look up at me. I wanted his eyes fixed on me. “Singing, ohhhh, ohhhh. Welcome home tonight. Ohhhh. Ohhhh. Tonight.” I then dropped down to both my knees between his legs and looked up at him. My eyes never left his. I took my microphone free hand and laced my fingers in his. “Words they don’t know how to make amends. All they do is push you to the edge.” They may fight with us. We may fight with them. We may fight each other. Times may be hard. “But it’s not wasted.” On you it never could be.

“It’s all done for you.” Ash and Jinxx began singing backups. “It’s all done for you.” Everything I do is for you now. “It’s all done for you.” We’ve lived for them, we love them. “It’s all done for you.” I love you. “Oohhh.” I wanted to smile and cry all simultaneously.

The audience erupted into shouts and screams. The lights stay dark. I rose up just enough to plant a subtle kiss on Sherlock’s cheek and whispered. “I love you.” I took his hand and led him back stage. He looked shocked. The tour manager took him back to my dressing room where I had another surprise for him waiting. I just wanted to finish this encore and go and kiss him properly.

In my dressing room was bouquet of red roses. Attached to the flowers was an envelope. In it were the two plane tickets back to London. We had several months off after tonight until we had to tour again. With the plane tickets were the lyrics to Done For You, and a letter to Sherlock, explaining the story behind the tickets and a few things I wanted to say. Every moment I have is going to be spent with him.

When the encore was done and I walked off stage, the walk to the dressing room was surreal. The guys all gave me pats on the back as I walked; it was all as if everything was in slow motion. We were finally going to get a significant amount of time together. All this waiting was finally over.

I opened the door and saw him nearly in tears. All I remember was tears beginning to form as I put my lips to his, after that it was as if time stopped and it was the only thing holding us in place.


End file.
